Hillbilly Hide-a-Way

If I started naming "laws" I could probably keep talking for thirty seconds before I ran out. Forty-five seconds if I spoke real slow. Nonetheless, I am now officially a "law clerk" (waiting for bar results to become "attorney") with three cases and a blog post as my responsibilities. And it's not this blog post - it's about real things like the CFTC. All after one day of real, honest to goodness work. Last week's orientation was fine and uneventful. Today all the action got started. And I'm pretttttty excited to dive in.

Not only was it my first day of work, our new office opened its doors today, making it a sort of Day One for everyone. This was to my advantage; everyone else was walking around inquisitively as well. The new office is nice. It looks like a cross between an Ikea catalog and an Apple store. Everything is white and wood. The best feature: my desk can mechanically be raised into a standing desk, or lowered to my comfort. It even has saved settings! Blew my mind!
The downside: for all the technology, my office has a mouse pad, but no mouse. It also has no keyboard, docking station, or monitor. All I had today was a tiny little laptop. And a mechanical desk. The irony.

 I spent the last few days of my stay-cation visiting Erica in North Carolina. It was mostly ranting about menial things (pretty much the best pastime ever) and eating bar-b-cue (the second best pastime ever). Lots of bar-b-cue (bbq?). I mean...LOTS. We went to this place in the middle of nowhere (read: the middle of nowhere) called Hillbilly Hide-a-way for a family-style dinner. It was quite simply phenomenal. To give you an idea, it included fried chicken, fried fish, green beans in butter, cinnamon apples, corn bread, mashed potatoes, gravy, bacon, and more. The next morning I ate a pulled pork sandwich for breakfast. I literally could not eat for the next two days. I think I had...a granola bar and some Diet Coke.  Look at this plate (and note the basket of "whipped spread." As I said at the time, "Oh look, they took butter and made it less healthy").

Seeing Erica was, of course nice. We had a little rage time. Released the fury. For me, that started in the car when I was stuck in an hour and a half-long traffic jam. I tried to leave a calm voicemail saying I'd be late, but I ended up yelling about it. Road rage like whoa.
On Friday morning, Erica was at class and I wanted Starbucks. So I used my handy dandy smartphone to track one down. Turned out my search for caffeine took me to "downtown" Winston Salem. I walked around both blocks of it. It was a slow-paced, quaint place with a surprising about of cultural diversity. And three bars, one of which is apparently the local favorite. I was jealous; nice beer cost about $4. The good life.

Exhausted. Time to sleep.

Blog Rededication to My Own Often un-PC Throughts

New look for the blog. It shows minimal effort on my part, which is better than no effort. What do ya think? I'm open to suggestions.

Today at the Nationals game I was surrounded by Boyscouts and their families. Little boyscouts. Cub scouts? I had the un-PC urge to yell, "Why do you hate gay people?" My goal is just to prompt some productive family dialogue about tolerance. Don't worry, I didn't do it. I know they probably don't individually hate gay people. But seeing the reactions would have been amusing. I'm just jealous because I'm not good at tying knots like them. And because they don't sell delicious thin mints.
This was actually just a thing that ran through my mind for about two seconds. What really became the problem was not being surrounded by boyscouts, but being surrounded by small children. It's very difficult for me to cheer for my team, or heckle the other team, without using profanity. Heck, it was difficult to maintain interesting conversation with my party without using profanity. I should probably expand my vocabulary. Torpor. There's a good new word. It describes the play of the Nationals today. Sad but true.

The Onion was right on in pointing out features of the new iPhone. So the iPhone 5 is lighter and thinner. But was anyone complaining about how thick and heavy the iPhone 4 was? Was anyone's pocket or purse severely burdened by this device? Why is this a selling point? Why isn't the new iPhone dialogue more focused on Apple obnoxiously changing the charger so that everyone has to buy adapters? I'm stickin' with my ol' iPhone. Call me old fashioned as I sit here using Face Time over wireless only and sitting in my rocking chair. There's nothing wrong with it.
The Samsung commercial pointing out all the flaws in the iPhone marketing is great because it's true. It's also a big F-U to Apple. I think in the Apple-Samsung wars, I may be siding with Samsung.

Orientation Tomorrow

Tomorrow is my first day of work! I am pretty excited. Well, it's an orientation day that includes two hours of IT training. So I guess that is less exciting. But I'm pumped to start it up. A job that is the culmination of three or twenty years of school, depending on how you look at it. This is the true meaning of the Alice Cooper's classic. In preparation I filled out tax forms, gathered my I-9 documentation, and did some hardcore ironing. Mmmmm nothing like a good pregame.

I was asked whether I anticipate having trouble sleeping tonight. I am a terrible sleeper before lots of big nights. The night before the practice multistate bar I slept maybe three hours (interestingly, the nights before the actual two days of the bar I slept alright). But I think I'll be alright: 1) I already worked there for a summer, 2) it's just orientation, and 3) I think I'm only there two days this week while my office moves. So that removes lots of pressure. And at least half of my excitement for this week revolves around getting to go out and do something during the day.

I have been getting out of the house more, mostly by going to Nationals games. I went to the double-header on Wednesday, the game on Thursday (thereby seeing the entire Dodgers-Nationals series), and the game today. All for about $8 to see a first place team. Wow, coming from Boston where tickets were impossible to get, forget about the price, that is stunning.  (And I really don't want to talk about the Red Sox right now, except to say that we are not in last place.)
At one of the games, there was a fight between a Dodgers fan and a Nationals fan. I didn't know anyone cared enough about the Nats to physically defend them. And it wasn't even in the belligerent bleachers. The combatants were right behind the Dodgers dugout, maybe three rows up. In other words, they paid hundreds of dollars to get their seats and all they got was an escort out of the stadium. Security won the fight.

The Emmys are on! I don't care!

The Patriots are on! I care more! These replacement referees are just terrible. Killin' me. And I don't even care that much about football. I mean, it's not baseball. But this is out-of-control bad refereeing. And as an athlete, nothing angered me more than awful refereeing. So as I type this, I have higher blood pressure and I am arguing with my television. My television is not phased.

Retreat

I'm at the point where doing nothing is getting a wee bit boring. It would be better if everyone else were doing nothing, then we could do something together. But the work week is quite the barrier, all these people with jobs and responsibilities. How unfair. I did have three days of actual scheduled time this past week. My group at the firm had a retreat here in DC. Well it was in Arlington, VA technically but that's close enough. There was a cocktail reception, a day and a half of meetings, and two nights of going out on the town. The meetings were mostly geared towards partners, although they did give me a better sense of what the practice group does. The social aspects were far more productive for me (not to mention more fun than listening to the head of the group remind partners to get their bills out on time). It was good to meet the people I will be working with. I think that type of relationship is much better with someone you have met in person. Call me old fashioned, but I feel much better taking work from people I have shaken hands with. And the flip side of that is that people who have met me are more likely to give me work and frankly be nicer to me. I even talked to some associates about my interests and got preemptively put on some cases. Department of Energy enforcement action, here I come! (Not sarcastic. I am actually excited about being a part of the matter.)

And then there were the nights we went out. The first night we went to POV, on top of the W Hotel to give the attorneys from the other offices a DC feel. The second night was more intense. We went to a restaurant with 1) a great view, 2) terrible food, and 3) an open bar. The DC attorneys formed an ad hoc party-planning committee and headed to 18th Street. They wanted a classier place to begin the night, and I suggested Jack Rose. In retrospect, it was a ballsy move for a not-yet associate to steer the entire group but it paid off. The bar features a huge whiskey list, good beer, and a fun atmosphere. The highlight was definitely buying a partner a manhattan and praying she liked it. Luckily she did, and now I feel like she is barred from being mean to me for my first six months. After everyone had a few drinks under their belt (metaphorically, if that were literal it would be quite odd), we headed up to Adams Morgan and settled at Millie and Al's. It ain't a classy place, but it got the job done. I definitely had a jello shot with a few partners including the international head of our practice group. Then I headed home around 1 am to be ready for our 8 am breakfast. I was far from the last one there. The group partied hard and was full of fun people. I'm glad to be joining up. It's far better than it could have been (Ex.: "This shiraz smells of currant and red berries. What do you think? Now I must retire for it hath past nine o'clock and  I must be fresh for the morning meetings.")

Also at Jack Rose, I got asked my name by a bouncer under the excuse that someone dropped some unknown item. Immediately after, a girl came over and asked me my name. Well turns out it wasn't someone flirting or being sketchy; she was a girl I knew in elementary school and hadn't seen in about 20 years. But she recognized me. I guess I really have looked the same since I was four.

DC Chillin'

It's sort of hard to update when you have so little to update about. For example, this week I sat around, watched Hell's Kitchen, and played video games. For variety, I read a book on my balcony. You see what I'm saying? Not a lot to get excited about. Although I am happy to have down time. Possibly my last down time ever. Don't panic, it's not because the world is ending Maya-style. It's because I start work in September and don't know when I'll have another opportunity to just chill.

Some 1L friends are beginning their quest to law school. It took me back to my first week of 1L. That was a dark time...that I never have to repeat. Woooooo. But it sucks for everyone, rest assured. It takes an hour to read twenty pages, you don't understand half the words, and you pray to the Law School Deity that you don't get cold called to explain what you read but didn't understand during class. Par for the course.
I got to reminisce about this with some friends/co-law school graduates last night at the bar. (The bar had a bocce ball area. I didn't even know what that was before last night - sort of bourgeois shuffle board as it turns out - but I liked it.) We all agreed the first week took forever and was awful. Then we poured a little out in memory of Aaliyah. Well, I did that.

I got a couch! It's been three years since I promised to get a couch for this apartment. Apparently I am a little slow. But I no longer have to sit on a broken, miserable futon to watch TV. All it took was a week of craigslisting plus a U-Haul rental so that I could, um, haul it.

On my run through Georgetown, I passed a bank that was taped off with an FBI evidence truck in front of it. No Neil Caffrey sightings though. That could either be because he is based in New York or because he is a fictional character. Draw your own conclusions. The point is that White Collar episodes cannot come out fast enough.

Viva el Peru

I'm back from Peru. It was amazing. My itinerary took me all over. Lima; Cuzco; Sacred Valley; three day hike on the Lares Trek; Machu Picchu; Puerto Maldonado and the rainforest; and the desert Oasis of Huacachina. Rather than recount my entire trip, I am just going to do a Top 5 list. This is very much in the spirit of a DC-Lima in-flight movie (High Fidelity, also one of my favorites).

Top Five Favorite Parts Peru
5. The Night Sky - You just don't get stars like that in DC. Or almost anywhere. Plus the view from the southern hemisphere was totally different. I got to see the Southern Cross, called the Andean Cross in Peru. Especially on the hike, you could see the Milky Way with incredible clarity. I'm not usually a sap about things like this, but it was breathtaking. The best part about the sky is that I can only remember it - it was impossible to take a picture. On a steep descent from sappiness, I had the best pee of my life on the second night of the hike. The moon was so bright I didn't need my flashlight, and I got to pee while gazing at the universe. It was a transcendent urination.

4. The Hike - The hike was a great experience that I would be happy never to repeat. The first and third days were basically fine. The second day was quite trying. We hiked to an altitude of 4600 meters (~15,088 feet) above sea level. More than one person felt quite sick at that altitude. I actually did fine with the altitude; it only made it difficult to breathe while hiking. But Jen couldn't eat lunch because of how altitude sick she was on the second day. The last 30 minutes on the way to the 4600 meter peak were steep and difficult. On the other side lay a picturesque lagoon. If you didn't feel like you were about to roll over and die, the hike was totally worth it.

The hike also included two nights of camping. We were told it was going to get a little cold. But we were warned in Celsius, so I didn't really pay attention/understand. (Though we Americans are actually the silly ones for using Farenheit - USA! USA! - why is 32 freezing rather than 0?) The first night was cooooold. I wore two pairs of wool socks and still couldn't feel my toes. Every time I woke up I would wiggle them just to make sure all ten toes were still there. When we woke up in the morning, the condensation on the outside of the tent had frozen, and ice fell on my head as I unzipped the tent flap. Turns out it went down to -10 Celsius, or 14 degrees Fahrenheit. I was completely unprepared for that.
The second night, I wasn't getting fooled again. I put on three pairs of socks, four layers, and a hat. The extra clothing and the slightly higher temperature made for a slightly less chilly night. I am happy to never again go camping when it is below, or even approaching, freezing.

3. The People - The people were diverse and friendly. I had lots of interesting conversations: discussing Kafka with a German, how ayahuasca helped my Peruvian guide deal with alcohol abuse, and the problems of conflating religion and politics with an Egyptian. I traveled with tourists from over a dozen countries, talked with a number of locals, and made some friends. Everyone I traveled with was outgoing and inclusive. And the guides really made the trip. (Except the rainforest one. He was terrible.) Additionally, Jen made a great travel partner. The most serious conflict we had arose over a fact that we couldn't Google due to lack of internet.

2. Sandboarding and Dune Buggying - At the desert oasis of Huacachina, 'the thing' to do is to rent a dune buggy, drive to the top of some high dune, and board down it. The dune buggy itself is a bit like a roller coaster ride - with smaller drops and more danger of getting seriously injured. The buggy was great fun, and it allowed us to get amazing views of the sun setting over the desert and of the oasis. A sandboard is basically a low-tech snowboard...really just a piece of board-shaped wood. You can ride it toboggan-style on your belly, or snowboard-style standing up. The former is definitely preferred for larger dunes. I attempted the smallest dune snowboard style, having never boarded down anything before and never even been skiing. I actually made it 95 percent of the way down before falling painfully on my hip and resolving not to try that again. Sand can hurt. I popped up with a groan, saying "Nothing that a beer can't fix." The final ride lasted about 18 seconds, which is a pretty long time to be hurtling down a sand dune with absolutely no control over your tiny piece of wood.
Sidenote: In Huacachina, I heard "Wonderwall" twice. It was so damn literal that I could do nothing but laugh for the entire 4 minutes of the song.
Sidenote 2 - Sidenote Strikes Back: Huacachina was generally a silly place. It was so small that you could see just about every structure in town from any point next to the lagoon. And the lagoon itself was silly. It was one of the least impressive bodies of water I've ever seen (small - less than 7 minutes to do the circumference in a rusty, old paddle boat). But it was also very impressive because it's a freaking lagoon in the middle of the desert.

1. Machu Picchu - It lived up to the hype and then some. It deserves its status as a modern wonder of the world. The photos don't do it justice. A book ("Turn Right at Machu Picchu" - thanks Carole!) described it as "sublime." That may actually be the most appropriate word for it. Another I will try is "awesome," in the sense of inspiring awe and wonder. It was best early in the morning, when it was only "had lots of" tourists and was not yet "infested with" them. Two of the best experiences were seeing the sun rise over Machu Picchu and climbing to the Sun Gate to see the city from afar. I have tons of pictures, but none of them adequately capture the scene. You just have to go.

Post-Bar...Peru

The bar exam is officially over. And it feels great. The days leading up to the bar were a little tense. The two days of the bar were not the most pleasant. But now things are awesome.
The bar was a surreal experience. There were two thousand people with gallon sized plastic bags trying to disguise their nervousness. All mobbing Hynes Convention Center. The first day of the bar was the multistate exam. Two-hundred multiple choice questions. I thought it went decently. There weren't too many crazy Property questions. And no Rule Against Perpetuities, which was a plus. I don't think even one bank forgot to record a mortgage due to a clerical error.
 The woman next to me got up to hand in her exam an hour before time in both the morning and afternoon sessions. That is either extreme confidence or extreme foolishness. I sat out the entire time, trying not to change my answers.

The second day consisted of ten essays, five in each session. I felt like I had a decent grasp on the morning session, but it really slipped away from me in the afternoon. A few of the essays I read over and over again, wasn't sure what they were asking about, and proceeded to make some crap up.  (My only relief is that other people seem to have done the same thing.) There was one essay containing a trust, which I must have read over and over for ten minutes until I decided it made no sense and the problem wasn't just me. Then I just made something up. On another essay, my knowledge of warranty laws was painfully insufficient. So I made something up. See the trend?

The afternoon session was probably the closet thing I've ever gotten to a panic attack. I lost all concept of time and had difficulty calculated how much longer I had whenever I looked at the clock. I felt myself almost fading into the chair, and the words on the computer seemed to expand. It was slightly disorienting. My last essay must read like the ramblings of an addled man who knows a marginal amount about criminal procedure. I'm just hoping that the first day and the morning session can make up for any deficiencies. But really the important thing is that it's over!

At least we didn't have any bats at the bar exam site (unlike Indiana) and no one had a stroke (Virginia). The worst thing was probably the hour and a half-long bag check line at the testing site, since everyone had their laptop case and the event planners did not use enough foresight.

After the bar, I went to the bar. McGreevy's, that is. The less stressful, more boozy type of bar. Where a number of lovely people came by to celebrate with me. Thanks to the non-bar taking contingent who came out: Ethan, Nakul, Erica, Kait, BDP, and whoever else I am missing. Then there was the crowd who had just taken the bar exam. We were...a deserved mess. We celebrated getting through ten weeks of studying and two (in some case three) days of the most important exam of our lives. There was much rejoicing.

I spent another day in Boston, saw Dark Knight Rises, and came back to DC. Everyone, you don't have to be embarrassed. No one else could understand half of what Bane was saying either. And how does he eat??? He has to drink through a straw, I imagine. But he is so big that he must be chugging protein shakes through the straw constantly. Yet, I didn't see any protein shakes in the movie. Plot hole! That's right, the plot hole I am concerned with has no bearing on the actual film. (Spoiler alert: the other thing that preoccupies me is that it must have taken Batman a long time to draw that bat sign in oil to get lit up, and they only had a few hours left to save Gotham. Is no one else concerned about Batman's time management priorities?)

After spending a couple days in DC, I leave for Peru tomorrow. I think I am all packed and ready to go. I'll be back the 14th. So if you need me, email is the best way to get in touch. Not that I'm bringing my laptop to hike Machu Picchu.
Boom. That's right, I'm hiking Machu Picchu. And spending a couple days in the Amazon. Plus Lima and Cuzco. If you are thinking "Will isn't much of an outdoorsman," then you would be right. ("I'm an outdoorsman, Donna.") But here I am being adventurous and expanding my horizons. My biggest fear about this trip is snakes. Because they are the worst in all contexts. All of them. I think spiders rank at number two. Three is zombie Incas confusing me with a conquistador. If those things don't come near me, I'll be all set.

To Peru!

A Link (not the Super Smash kind...sad)

Alright, I'm gonna throw out a link. This is the kind of crap I find funny these days. Really, on the bar exam about 5 banks will forget to record mortgages due to a clerical error. It's not most maddening thing. These banks didn't get to be billion dollar institutions by making clerical errors with regard to the stupid mortgages they hand out. No, they record and then foreclose on the house of some poor Joe who just got fired from his job at the Pizza Hut. Wow, studying for the bar can really take a toll on your sense of humor. Also on your wrists; I think I'm getting carpal tunnel.

I did laundry today. I don't think I lost any socks. Or I lost two socks and I don't know!

Cupid Shuffle

Saturday Ryan and Jess got married! Ryan is a husband, it's crazy. Congratulations to them. Mazel tov. The wedding was lots of fun. The couple was happy, the guests were happy, and the father/daughter dance inspired some tears. The ceremony was at a church in DC. It was a little more religious than I was expecting, though I don't know why since it was in a church after all. I think it's the first mass I've ever sat through, so that was neat. The reception was at the officer's club of an army base in Virginia. "But they don't allow drinking on army bases!" someone protested. "Oh yeah? Watch me," was my response. Turns out they didn't have any booze, just Shirley Temples.
I am kidding. They had an open bar which was nicely stocked (and some people did have "dirty Shirleys.") The bartender, however, was half deaf and repeatedly gave people a drink they had not ordered. Kerry asked for whiskey and received a cranberry vodka. Her theory was that the bartender figured that she's a chick and that's what chicks drink.
Another great facet of the wedding was the Bad Grammer love. It was great to see Erica, Celia, Dumps, Talya, and Josh. (It was also nice to see other people, but I was at the BG table so I'm focusing on them. And they are more important than most other people so...deal with it.) It is sincerely heartwarming that we are so much like family that we garner an entire table at the wedding reception.

Not to worry, the DJ played the "Cupid Shuffle." I know you were worried about it, but it happened. We also did the "Electric Slide." It was so long since I last did the Electric Slide that I nearly forgot how to do it. Luckily, it ain't exactly the most complicated dance in the world. It's at least one step below the "Single Ladies" music video.
Ryan stepped onto the dance floor with about fifteen seconds left in "Call Me Maybe." Upon hearing he had missed the song, he goes, "That's it. I really gotta quite smoking." Great motivation right there.

Every time I listen to the Black Eyed Peas I dislike them a little bit more. Their songs really are not good.
I'm really going with the music comments tonight. The background in Rihanna's "Hopeless Place" is basically just the "Macarena." Listen to it. Tell me I'm wrong.

Ryan's bachelor party was on Thursday, and was a great time as well. The highlight was going to the Columbia Room. The bartender's version of the rickey (the official drink of DC), called the shandy rickey, was one of the best cocktails I've ever had. And Ryan's drink, the Ghost Dance, was amazing as well. It involved burning some herbs with a brulee torch and putting the glass over it to get the glass smokey. It took pretentious craft cocktails to a whole new level. And I loved it.

Blah blah blah studying for the bar is a pain, barbri sucks, and so on. You know the drill. Don't let my briskness detract from my candor on this, however.

Taste-o-Vision

I have been neglecting this blog. I know it. But maybe that's because the most interesting thing I've done recently was correctly predict the winner of the MLB Home Run Derby (Prince!). Studying for the bar continues. At least tomorrow marks a milestone: the last day of lectures! I am positively wild-eyed with excitement. It means there's more time in the day to sit down and learn the material. More importantly, it means I never have to outline my lecture notes again. That is easily my least favorite part of my day to day routine. So...huzzah for that being over.
Last week I had a simulated exam over the course of two days. Well, most of an exam. There was a simulated 6 hour multistate exam, but only a half day local essay exam. The multistate went pretty well. It made me feel like I'm on the right track. Like I can actually do this. The local day made me...not as confident. I learned that I really need to work on essay writing. And I should probably learn property law.

This week is Ryan's bachelor party (Thursday) and wedding (Saturday). Besides saying mazel tov to him, I want to admonish him for picking a wicked inconvenient weekend to get married. Two weeks before the bar? How inconsiderate! But I'm pumped for both the bach party and the wedding. I'm also pumped to see a bunch of people at the wedding. All the improv people and other college people. Not the crappy people though. They know who they are. (Note: I actually don't know who I am referring to.)

I've been having trouble sleeping the past few nights. My favorite 2 AM sleepless pastime is watching the Food Network. But it comes with its perils. It's a really terrible feeling to 1) not be able to sleep and 2) really crave a surf and turf prepared by Bobby Flay. I'm really thinking that the Food Network is a perverse form of torture. Until they make taste-o-vision! I'll be the first in line at Best Buy for that. When I'm 106 years old. And probably don't have a lot left to live for, so I'm willing to give something that dangerous a chance. Whatever. It's a long way off.

Where are you calling from?

On we trudge through bar prep. Nothing particularly new on that front. More slogging. More questioning the integrity of barbri as a quality test preparation service.
I called the barbri Boston office to ask a question about one of their answers today. The woman answering the phone asked, "What bar are you taking?" Well, I called the Boston office, what do you think?? I've called twice and they have asked me both times. Why? Next time they ask, I'm going to tell them I'm taking Georgia, but I figured I'd call Boston just to see how the weather is. Then they refused to answer my question, because they only answer substantive questions during particular hours twice a week (read: they are only offering the remote possibility of being helpful during particular hours twice a week, at times when I have class - their class).

SCOTUS is supposed to health care-it-up tomorrow. Predictions? I say Chief Justice Roberts writes the opinion. It'll be either 5-4 striking the Act down or 6-3 upholding it. Chief Justice Roberts votes with Justice Kennedy and assigns the opinion to himself. Though I'm shaky, they could punt it down the road. My only real prediction is that Justice Scalia writes a separate opinion taking the most conservative line possible and belittling anyone who doesn't agree with him. (Not too much of a prediction, he's sort of a one-trick pony.)

Cupid Shuffle!!

Heat

So there's no way to stop LeBron. Congratulations Heat. Rueful congratulations. And premature - I'm still watching the game, but I don't think you can jinx something you don't really want to have happen.
Speaking of heat, is hit 100 in DC today. I liked it. I was inside most of the day watching a 3:40 Con Law lecture that moved painfully slowly and bracing myself for my nemesis: Torts. I start barbri's lectures on Torts tomorrow. In law school it was probably my least favorite class. Worst grade, worst experience, worst everything. And I'm waaaay behind everyone else since my 1L Torts professor, praised be his name (in his own head), taught us a crazy, biased, law and economics version of torts. Now, learning torts the regular version is totally different. The rules are clearer. We don't do comparative economic analyses, for one thing.

Other people are getting a little taste of the barbri Property lecturer. She is proving to be quite divisive - people love her or hate her. Or both. Most people start out loving her, but by the third day of her singing popular songs with words about Real Property out of key, people tend to turn to the dark side. I can't imagine why. 5 weeks and I'll have something else to talk about.

I'll smack you in the mouth, I'm Neil Diamond.

Kerry and I decided tonight that Jay-Z did not invent swag, as he claims on "Otis." Rather, it was a little known chemist from UCLA, Dr. Charles Swaggerstein who invented swag as a mistake while he was working on the Manhattan Project in 1942.
Jay-Z remains a Criminal Procedure expert, however, knowing his "glove compartment's locked, so is the trunk and the back, and I know my rights, so you gon' need a warrant for that."

Mini-Tantrums

Today while "condensing" my notes after lecture, I stopped and yelled at my computer: "Oh my god, I don't care!" It was just an irresistible impulse. Like a reflex to studying Evidence. If I think about Evidence for more than six hours a day, apparently I have to yell about it. I'm pretty happy no one else was around me at the time. It was akin to throwing a mini-tantrum. Great stuff.

Inspired by something I read, here is what I have learned so far from bar studying: Record your deed immediately. Do no accept a quitclaim deed, someone is screwing you over. Tumblrs about studying for the bar are more interesting than studying itself. I am capable of giving a crap for over five hours a day, but less than six. Don't go into property law.

Just booked my bar trip to Peru. It's gonna be baller. Machu Pichu, the Amazon, and Lima. I can't wait.

Florida

Friday through Sunday I took a (far too brief) vacation to Florida. The trip was prompted by a wedding; one of Kerry's high school friends got married on Marco Island. So I had little choice but to be dragged to the Gulf Coast of Florida. It took a lot of arm twisting. The wedding was on a beach, which I was previously unaware of. That would have been good to know beforehand. So there I sat in a wool suit during the picturesque ceremony. If the picture was of me, it would mostly be of me sweating, since it was about 88 degrees out. But the heat on the beach was temporary - the wedding moved inside for dinner and dancing. My biggest complaint about the wedding was that the DJ played a remix of Journey, which I found completely unacceptable. In other words, the wedding was a lot of fun. The food (filet mignon and pistachio encrusted snapper) was absolutely delicious, really pushing it over the top.

The morning after the wedding, Kerry and I went to the beach on the Gulf. Neither of us packed sunscreen, so we had to keep it brief. Lobster just ain't in the cards in the Gulf. I had never been in the Gulf before. It was warm, beautiful, and totally ridiculous for an ocean. Being a New Englander, I'm used to the Atlantic. If you're lucky it gets to the mid-fifties in there. Even in August, a wet suit is appropriate. The Gulf was otherworldly to me. It's not what salt water is about. But you know, I could get used to it. I liked not coming out of the water shivering. In June!

The other days, we hung out in Naples. It's a nice, albeit silly, place. There are three types of people there: regular people, retirees (who we can call older regular people), and super rich vacation homers. The super rich vacation people have these absolutely crazy homes. Like 20 bedroom, multimillion mansions with backyards on the Gulf to provide easy access to their yachts. Yachts, plural. And these are just vacation homes. It is hilarious yet sickening.
Besides these mansions, Naples had nice beaches, shopping and restaurants.I had some of the best sushi of my life (in Florida, surprising, right?). And went to a fun pub, concisely named "The Pub," that had a good vibe and lots of great beers. Much of yesterday was spent contemplating dropping this whole law thing and just being a bartender at The Pub. Silly you think? Well they get to wear kilts to work. How silly does that sound now?! I think it's just how I get after being somewhere pleasant, then returning to something as...unpleasant...as barbri. Unpleasant = me being polite.

Now I'm back to barbri, which is what I'm gonna go ahead and blame for my failure to update on. It really is time consuming! Especially when you spend days catching up because you take a trip to Florida. (Who is irresponsible enough to do that?)
I had a tussle with them, but I'll talk about that later. Too much effort.

Saturday night in Florida I got to check something off my list: make fun of a Heat fan. Me, to a guy in a Heat jersey: "Oh, you're a Heat fan. Nice to see that. I didn't think you were a real thing. Like a unicorn." Of course it came back to bite me. I ended up watching Game 7 in the home of Heat fans. But I don't really want to talk about that - it's too raw.
Instead, I'll talk about another first that happened that evening: I used a beer koozie. (Yes, I remain a New England elitist.) It was so exciting; my beer stayed cold for so long. Do they look ridiculous? Yes. But they serve a purpose. Count me in. I am so cosmopolitan now.

What Else Are We Missing?

Bar class has been plugging along. Not fun, but not awful. My routine is to go to school in the morning, do the assignments and review my notes, eat lunch, go to the Barbri lecture in the afternoon, come back and do the homework. It is unexciting, but necessary. But today, I had two back to back experiences that are really shaking my faith in Barbri.
This morning I was working on my first essay question of the entire course. I hadn't seen the form of the questions or the form of the model answers. The model answers, we are told, are truly model because they are written by attorneys with unlimited time and resources, whereas we are time pressured and have only our memories. The essay question was about corporations, a topic I took in law school and reviewed last week in Barbri's class. I wrote out my answer and identified three main issues: duty of loyalty, duty of care, and requirements for a derivative suit (I promise it doesn't matter what those mean right now). Then I flipped to the model answer, and it had only two issues: duty of loyalty and the derivative suit. What happened to the duty of care issue? I flipped back and looked at the question again, and I really thought I saw a care issue. Either I'm crazy and was spotting an issue that didn't exist, or Barbri's model answer - their model answer - was missing a huge part. I asked a friend or two whether they thought there should be a care issue. They both agreed with me, as did a girl in my lecture who also had done the problem. So are these model answers good answers or aren't they? Later in the day, I actually called Barbri to ask what was going on. They told me to call back tomorrow for some reason or another (probably because it was the end of the workday and they didn't want to deal with me - legit given how much their course costs?).
My second problem with Barbri is somehow more disturbing. Today's lecture was the second day of Real Property. I took the class in school, I've been reading, reviewing, and generally doing my work. So I was shocked when the lecturer missed one of the elements of adverse possession. There are five requirements, and she only listed four of them, excluding the requirement that possession be exclusive. This element was a question that came up on Barbri's own AMP software and on a practice question, so I was shocked that she could just leave it off. And it wasn't by mistake - the handout that we got excluded the element from the otherwise complete list. I couldn't believe it; I looked it up in Barbri's own provided materials just to make sure I was correct. And sure enough, she just blew it. (Then again, she also claimed her father invented penne alla vodka, so I don't know why I'm surprised.) While I'm happy that I caught the mistake, it is disturbing. I took property in law school and have a decent familiarity with it - what about the classes I didn't take? What about secured transactions, family law, and all the others? Are they omitting important details there too? It's just very unsettling, and I don't really know what to do about it. I can't exactly ask the lecturer what the deal was - she's just a video, recorded live last week in Boston. Ummmm, this seems like the beginning of something ominous. If I can't trust the lecturers, and I can't trust the model answers, who can I trust? I am the Jason Bourne of Barbri.

The Post-Graduate

So I took a little break from blogging. My official bar studying program (Barbri) starts tomorrow, so blogging is back to being an outlet for everything angry, hilarious, and random in my life. Especially because I will have limited human interaction for the next two months while I study. Boy, I can't wait to start! Actually, I can't wait to get the bar over with, to be an esquire.
In the meantime, I went to Boston, had a great time at the BG alumni show, attended an awesome gay wedding as Shaked's plus one, engaged in Grad Week festivities (most notably a memorable boat cruise on the Potomac with an open bar, dancing, great views, and better friends), got sick, got better, and finally graduated. There, now I am caught up. That (run-on) sentence makes me realize how little actually happens on a day-to-day basis. Life is all in the commentary.

Today I gave myself a paper cut on the lip while I was licking the envelope for a thank-you letter. It turned the graduation gift into a quid pro quo. No pain, no gain type of moment. Daniel Day Lewis predicted this: there will be blood.

Yesterday's Memorial Day came with bar-b-que festivities at Damien's house. It also came with 90 degree weather and a lot of sweat. The bar-b-que was entirely meat. Left to our own devices, an entirely man-planned bbq will not have side dishes. Diversity of foods means including hot dogs and chicken on the grill. What more could you need?

The real fun starts tomorrow when I get to listen to the Corporations I lecture for four hours. I actually want to start barbri; everyone else seems to have already begun. It makes me feel like I am missing something and causes unease. It also means that no one has time to hang out, so I might as well be working myself.
This set up where I start my preparation for the Massachusetts bar this week is another thing designed for New Yorkers to feel superior. The New York bar prep started last week, so my New York peers have been looking down at us inferior, "easier" states. Oh New Yorkers, you so silly.

Oh, and Dave is moving down here on Friday to start a new job. I am pumped for that. A friend from high school leaves (Rebecca) and another one comes. Fair deal.

Done. That is all.

The Weakest Link

I went into today feeling good, not great about Computer Crime. As the day progressed, I felt better and better. Remember the curve. In the morning, I was studying with a friend when three other people in the class came over and started asking us questions. That was fine for a little, but after a while it gets annoying. I'm your classmate, not your tutor. I'm happy to help, but not teach you the things you totally missed. Studying with more than three people is almost always a waste of time, so I declined the invitation to go "talk about possible policy questions" in the afternoon. My best guess is that was code for "reassure ourselves that we'll be fine despite not paying much attention during the semester." I didn't really need to do that. I find it a better use of time to study rather than to wallow.

The review session was also confidence-inspiring. A kid spent five minutes asking our professor about mens rea requirements. And not some nuance in the law. He didn't understand the role of the jury in determining whether a defendant did something "knowingly" and how you would go about proving that. The concept really baffled him. Dude, you introduce evidence and elicit testimony. That's how trials work. Always. You should have learned that in 1L Criminal Law. Actually, you should have learned that watching "Law and Order." You are the weakest link, goodbye.

That awful feeling when all the sports teams you care about lose in the same night.

Last Exam. Some Reflections.

Tomorrow is my last exam from 2-5. Computer Crime. I can't wait for it to be done and to have a champagne toast with my friends on the patio at 5:10. It will be the end of my official law school career. So I guess it's my last real day of law school. I can't help but reflect on the differences between where I am now and where I was at the beginning of law school.
At the beginning, I hated law school and didn't want to be there. Now, I...still hate law school and can't wait to get out of there. Alright, so that's not different. But I do feel like I have learned and grown. While I wouldn't claim to know "law" or be incredibly prepared to be a practicing attorney, I do feel like I acquired special skills that set me apart. As hokey as it sounds, a way of thinking. It involves no Kool-Aid, don't worry. My Civil Procedure Professor (also Separation of Powers professor) was totally right 1L year when he said that law school was about learning skills. And only some skills -  analytical skills. Others were completely ignored. My professor told me that some of the faculty of my school were brilliant minds, but couldn't interact with a client if a million dollars depended on it. Absolutely. That was the best advice I got. In order to succeed in law school, my professor told me, just to work hard and don't cut corners; work on developing the analytical skills. So that's what I did. I did my reading, briefed cases, went to class, and prepared diligently for finals. I learned how to do work every day, as silly as that might sound. Maybe for the first time in my life I challenged myself. And anyone who is going to law school and wants to succeed, I would give them my Civ Pro professor's advice. It's about skills. That's what you are working to learn and it requires hard work to succeed.

That's why 1L year was the worst. First year they scare you to death. Truth. I had no idea what to expect going into my first exams. No one did. It really was getting thrown into a pool without knowing how to swim. I maintain that first round of exams were a crap shoot. No one has any idea what the test will look like, what their answers should say, or how much they need to prepare. You do what you can and hope for the best. I think I was hoping for one A my first semester, which is sort of funny in retrospect. But after first exams, there's a steep learning curve. Now, in my sixth exams period, exams are still difficult. But I am no longer hoping for only one A. It's no longer a game of chance. But exams take a lot of work and I will be happy to dispense of them tomorrow. Except that other one, what's it called now? The bar? But that's a concern that can be put on hold for a couple of weeks.


For college, I was sad to leave though ultimately ready to move on. Now, I am excited to get out of law school and get on to practicing. The only trepidation I feel is my natural aversion to change and the fear that comes with having the label of professional student cast aside.
I had some great professors. I had some awful professors (Torts! I'm looking at you.). But mostly, I had decent professors.
I met some great people who will be friends for life. I met some people I wish I could un-meet. And I met tons of people I'm indifferent about.
I dealt with an administration that was awful. Uniformly awful. And that's why I can't wait to leave and never donate. My revenge.

Mostly, I am excited for my next step. I have a job that I am anxious to start. It's not my dream job, but I am very happy with it.  I won't get a student discount at the movie theater anymore. I won't be living on loans. I think I will officially qualify as an "adult." It's going to be nuts.

Wow, pretty reflective. Especially from a guy who would rather wrestle a bear than write a reflective essay for class. More anger and debauchery will come soon. Just remember, next week is Grad Week.

One more full day of studying. Just one more. I might need to watch the "This is SPARTA" speech to motivate myself through it.

All Generalizations Are Stupid

Computer crime is not coming easily to me. I'm not great with the substantive criminal law stuff for the most part; I just don't think well in those terms. But I still have a few days. Two more in fact. No time to let up off the gas now. All I need is a good night's sleep to let my brain relax and get ready to have some knowledge punched into it. (New study technique - punching my brain! Why didn't I think of that before my sixth finals period?) Then the party starts at 5pm sharp on Wednesday. We will show Miley Cyrus a real party in the USA. There are so many better "party" references I could have made there. Oh, here's one: don't worry, Andrew W.K., we will party hard. Too dated? Ah nuts.

I just saw "The Descendants." I liked it, but it was so unrealistic; no one would cheat on George Clooney.

It's pretty funny how the outside world stops for me during finals. "Do you want to go to Ray's Hellburger for lunch?" Yes, I want the best burger in DC, but can't, I have to study. "Want to go camping?" Love to, but studying. Where are my friends? They all seem to have magical times every December and April. Major world events could be happening right now, and I wouldn't know about them. I don't read the news. All I read today was a nice piece in the Times about a 92-year old man who sends bootleg DVDs to American soldiers in Afghanistan and Iraq. And I justified that through its relation to computer crimes.

Soon. Soon.

Powers: Separated

The Separation of Powers final was this afternoon. It was pretty rough. The issue spotter had so many constitutional problems it was hard not to get them mixed up. And I think I threw in a completely superfluous Appointments Clause analysis - let's hope that was actually an issue and I don't get docked points for wasting the professor's time when reading. The policy question was about recess appointments, which we talked about for maybe half of one class period. So, there it is. On one hand, what's done is done. On the other hand, I really wanted to do well in that class so there's plenty of ways to do meaningless worrying. Can't wait. In perspective, I like hard exams - they are hard for everyone and I seem to do better on them. Any moron can do well on an easy exam; the hard exams weed out the less prepared and place them appropriately on the curve. Let's hope. Knock on wood. Knock on internet. Ok, I'm done worrying about it.

The comedown from this exam is sort of harsh. I was so hyped up on adrenaline and aggrandizement that I like don't know what to do with myself. What will I study?? Oh right, Computer Crime. My last final. Dun dun dun. If you mess with this post it could, like, totally be a computer crime. I'm not really sure. I'll get back to you after I do some studying. Somehow I am just not as into this final. My final final. Ever. I'm into that. I'm into saying goodbye to law school. And I'm into Grad Week (our senior week equivalent) which includes a boat cruise (read: booze cruise) and brunch (read: boozy brunch). Oh law students. Well, there won't be kickball, so this senior week will be disappointing, I can tell already.

I wish I had other, interesting, insightful things to talk about. But it's hard during finals! My focus is on academic achievement. And misery. Anyone know any good procrastination tools that aren't internet memes full of .gif files? Also, the word meme: how do you say that out loud??

Some guy was talking to his friend today about Robert Griffin III as I was walking by. He said "This guy's RG3" and I looked at him. He goes "Him...not you..." gesturing to his friend. I know I'm not the #2 overall pick in this year's draft. Way to rub salt in the wound.

Dance to the Music

Don't Timeline me, bro. But really, don't make me change.

The other day I ran into a guy named Rusmir Music. He worked in the career center at my college. He was so much more than your typical, unhelpful career counselor. He once asked Shaked if she had checked for jobs on Google. He is sort of like an elusive, magical being who you never really want to see, but ya can't help being "excited" about it. I was luckily on the phone when I encountered him. He looked at me and said "I know you." I looked at him and nodded. Then walked away. I honestly forgot that he was in DC, though Shaked had mentioned that to me about a year ago. Hadn't seen him in three years and I wasn't really that upset about it. Getting home I emailed some of my college friends (apologies to anyone I forgot to include in my rush!) to report a sighting of the elusive Rusmir. Also, I may or may not have a stuffed unicorn named after him (purchased by Ethan, named by Shaked, resented by me).

Oh right, I took my Trusts and Estate final yesterday. Bye bye to that class. Huzzah! It was pass/fail, so I wasn't all that worried. I definitely passed. Knock on wood. Currently, I think it was a mistake to pass/fail it. Should have used that on Computer Crime where the stuff is way more difficult. I felt pretty good about the T&E final, but apparently lots of people thought it was really difficult. Maybe it's just because I didn't stress, but I didn't think it was that bad. But that's about the last thing someone wants to hear about when their reaction to the final is borderline manic.

Next final is Separation of Powers on Friday. I wish it were tomorrow, I'm ready. Strong side! Left side! You get the picture. I'm psyched up for it. I'm ready to go. I made an outline, a policy supplement, a chart, and I have a few pre-written answers. Even the boy scouts are jealous. It's the only class I really care how I do in. So it had better be good.
Sidenote: Separation of Powers rocked my mind. Basically, most for-cause removal provisions are probably unconstitutional, which totally undermines what you learn in Con Law I and day 1 of Administrative Law. The whole things is conceptually crazy. And I love it. And there are no jobs in it. Especially because I didn't go to Harvard or clerk for a Supreme Court justice. Damn it. It's that kind of thing that no one tells you before law school - all the cool, interesting areas of law, well no one really practices them. Dreamscrashandburn.

Goodnight moon. Goodnight cow, jumping over the moon.

Start the Countdown

First off, RIP Levon Helm. The Band was great, his voice was great, and his drumming was unlike anyone else's. I've been listening to "The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down" on repeat for the last two days.

That started things off on a downer. Let's see if we can kick it up. Uhhhh.
Whiskey time. It's like Hammer Time, but with less dancing.

Tomorrow I start the countdown: 31 days til graduation. Well I just reported that, I just started the countdown. And why not start at 31 - it's just as arbitrary as 30 days. It's just less traditional. But you know what, I've agreed with little about law school so far, so why agree to a 30 day countdown? Come to think of it, I have an extra ticket to graduation. Want to come?
Do you think they let pandas come to graduation? Even if they have a ticket??
At graduation I'm thinking about dressing up as Waldo. But I think it might be too easy for everyone.

My allergies have been acting up recently. Yesterday I sneezed on a jogger. Sorry!

GMail forced its new format upon me. I don't like it. "Will doth protest too much, methinks." Fair.

So today I went to office hours with my Separation of Powers professor. I asked him a question about the constitutional test for removal provisions (I know, I know, stay with me here). There is a traditional test that has been around since the 1930's, which is the test I learned in both Con Law I and in Administrative Law. But there was a case in the 80's, Morrison v. Olson, that has a sort of contrary result and a different test. So I asked whether we should discuss both tests, which seemed reasonable to me since two classes in the past two years taught me the 1930's test as good law. My professor told me the Morrison test displaced the old ones and they are now clearly not the correct standard. Well really is that what the Supreme Court would say or is that just your opinion? I honestly can't tell. There is something unsettling about learning one way to do things in fundamental classes and then getting to an upper level class and learning that you might be totally wrong. It's sort of like when Matt Hope told me that gravity doesn't quite work as a theory. It's a little, well, mind-blowing. And not in the "Requiem for a Dream" way. I guess the answer is that for the final I go with what my professor says. And in real life, I will never get the opportunity to argue a constitutional removal issue, so I don't have to worry too much about it. There's the glass door of reality hitting you smack in the face as you try to charge on through.

Anticlimax and the End of Classes

Law school classes and all school classes are now officially done. I'm happy, but it was anticlimactic. I was thinking about bringing in those things where you pull a string and it explodes with confetti to Trusts & Estates, but I didn't out of respect for the cleaning staff. Class just ended, then I left and ate lunch. No Alice Cooper blaring over the PA system. No congratulatory handshake from a man in a tuxedo and top hat who is also handing me a key to the city. Just a sandwich. Anticlimax. But still, I'm happy about it. After my last class, I went over a practice test for Separation of Powers with a classmate. I'm trying to hit the ground running for finals, but I feel pretty prepared and I have tons of time. So I guess I'm in a good place with that.

On some level I can't believe I made it through to the end of law school. I really contemplated calling it quits during first year in particular. But here I am. One paper and three finals to go.

What's that? Oh, my paper is finished. Just three finals to go. That's right, I made the necessary edits on my Antitrust paper. But I'm no fool; this time I'm going to sit on it and not hand it in until the end. Yes, last time I was being unnecessarily cranky about having to do extra work and it was a reflection I'm not proud of. But I'm also not proud that I ate so many Charleston Chews today. And they were delicious. My paper is gloriously done. And I feel pretty good about it. The professor is talking about workshopping it in the summer/fall into something that I will eventually publish to "make a name for myself in the field." That's a generous offer. We'll see how it goes. I'm pretty intimidated by the fact that he can make a few phone calls and have the principal lawyers for the that case I am writing about come talk to me. I'm worried they are just sucking up to my professor and will think my paper is...how do you say...terrible. I'd rather not have my bubble burst at the moment. I'm proud of my original research.

Overheard in DC: "Meet Anne. She is our gender conflict sociologist advanced researcher." What?! That is not an acceptable job title. It means nothing yet each individual part is a buzzword. Impressive in its own way, I admit, but not in the way it is supposed to be.

Last Classes

I have two law school classes left. As luck would have it they are both Trusts & Estates, the class that makes me into Mr. Happy Fun Time. But for another three hours I can deal with it. My last two classes of school. Ever. Am I nostalgic? Maybe a bit. But any nostalgia I have is currently overwhelmed by the excitement of being done.

It's sort of weird - I don't feel a ton of finals pressure. My first final is a week from Tuesday, so I still have plenty of time. I almost wish I could move up my finals and be done earlier. As it is, my end date is May 2nd. And it cannot come soon enough.

Last night was Barrister's Ball (Law Prom). Kerry and I went to the pregame at Reza's with a bunch of other people. But right as we arrived, a fire alarm went off on the first floor of Reza's building and the elevators were shut down. So we had to hike up nine floors of stairs in our fancy clothes (and some people in their heels) and back down again to head out. It was an amusing spectacle. Also amusing was playing beirut in a suit. I don't think I've ever done that before.
Barrister's itself was fun. It was a nice social capstone to law school. Good people lookin' good, if a bit intoxicated at times. I got to chat with people enough that I nearly lost my voice (oh, and I've been feeling a little sick too). Ok, I don't know how to express it in a narrative form/I'm lazy, so I'm going with a pro and con list.
Barrister's Pros:
Good people
Good drinks at the open bar
Nice venue
Two classes left. 3L's! (I didn't stay until the end, but I can only hope that they played Vitamin C's "Graduation" at the end. Or maybe "Piano Man."

Cons:
Long lines to get to the open bar (resulting in lots of double fisting)
For some reason I really wanted tequila - poor choice which I realized once I got it
Not so good DJ

Ah, so good times. The night ended, as every night should, with jumbo slice pizza in Dupont.

I'm trying to do Deep Thoughts (since I don't have Twitter). But my thoughts really aren't that deep most of the time. I'd say my average thought is along the lines of "Man, Dunkin Donuts coffee is delicious." But that doesn't have the required depth.

Oh, did I mention that my final reading assignment for law school is complete? Not that I'm gloating about this finishing thing.

Between my roommate and me, we managed to sort of explain the 2008 sub prime mortgage crisis. I felt smarter from the effort. I'm getting all cocky about it. But I'm certain I'm wrong somehow.

Diligent Guys Finish Last

Right, I have something to complain about that is caddy and quite frankly does not represent my best qualities. That's exactly why I created this blog. Thanks, blog. So here it is. My Antitrust professor announced a few weeks ago that he would like to see drafts of our papers to give us feedback before the final draft was handed in. I worked diligently and got a draft to him early - last week. Today in class my professor thanks the three of us who handed in drafts, schedules meetings with us for tomorrow to give us feedback, and tells everyone the due date for the papers. Sounds to me like the people who didn't hand in drafts just hand in the final. The people who did hand in drafts have to do more work revising them. So by working diligently, I get more work to do. And I can't exactly say this to him because the response is "So your paper will be better." Yes, it might be. But I also have to do much more work on it than anyone else. And honestly my priority right now is getting all of my law school work done. As quickly as possible. We'll see what the feedback is tomorrow and how much revising he expects me to do. But right now my reaction is: Damn. It.

Moving on to complaining about Trusts and Estates, a now-weekly segment. Yesterday, we spent an hour and a half learning about fiduciary duties. Or re-learning. Or re-re-learning, as it were. Since I've already learned about fiduciary duties in at least two classes that I can think of. So basically this was nothing but a gigantic waste of my time. I really must thank my previous professors for teaching my trusts and estates. Full of rage.

I spent the weekend in Boston for Passover. Seder at our house included nine delicious bottles of Veuve Clicquot. Seder at my cousin's house included nine crazy relatives. It was a mixed bag.

Finals pressure is beginning. Even though little is on the line, I'm beginning to stress out and feel pressure. I have rarely wanted something to be done as much as I do law school. I might have a "Suck it, law school" themed graduation party. You can come.

Goodbye, Rick Santorum. It's been real. My presidential race prediction: there will be a serious lack of sweater-vests on the campaign trail. Another prediction: Mitt Romney will say something disingenuous.

Facebook has been threatening to give me a "timeline" for a while now. And gmail has been telling me it will update its look soon. But I like my profile and my current "look." You can take them when you pry them from Charleton Heston's cold dead hands! Ew, that's actually a creepy reference. Though appropriate for Passover.

Gold Card

Today I purchased enough beverages on my Starbucks Card to qualify for a Gold Card. I am awesome. I don't find it problematic at all that I've purchased 30 drinks at Starbucks over the past two and a half months. I'm really saving money since all my extras like syrup and soy are free. And every 15 drinks I buy, I get a free one. Things are fine. "Denial ain't just a river in Egypt." You can't even be addicted to caffeine. It's just psychological. And required among law students.

I finally filed by state taxes. It's a lot more gratifying than it really should be. Now all the administrative work I have to do is filing my bar application. Great. Who wants to write me a recommendation? As far as I can tell the only qualification is that you cannot be a family member. And you can't lie about my criminal record. So you can't say I have one. I would also prefer it is you overlooked some of my indiscretions like anything mentioned on this blog. It's likely only a matter of time until you have to disclose all blogs and social networking sites you operate to the board of bar examiners.
How do you become a member of the board of bar examiners? Do you get paid for that? Seems like an easy job, if a bit sadistic.

My Antitrust professor will now get to review to possible train wreck that is my paper. On the flip side, it could be pretty good. I'm not sure, so I guess that I'm happy to get preliminary feedback on it. It has math in it and an appendix containing graphs and charts! This is some high school stuff, in the way that it is stuff I haven't done since high school. Now I am preparing to be disappointed when I get a comment saying "This is high school-level legal reasoning." Hrm. Upon consideration, that is the comment I would give to my Trust & Estates professor about his class. Can't wait until course evaluation time!

I don't get Google+. Can someone explain why I need one?

You know how homosexuals aren't a protected class? Well I clearly think it is ridiculous. I think that we should give protections to any class that Hitler persecuted. If Hitler hated them, they are doing something right. That's how we should determine things.

The more law school I get through, the angrier I get when I listen to non-lawyers talk about legal issues as if they are totally assured of what they are saying. Most recently prompted by a discussion about Supreme Court justices recusing themselves about the health care case.

Taking Tax was really helpful. I can tell people that lottery winnings are definitely not taxed at a different rate than income from your job. That's just false. It's all income (and then there's capital gains, but let's not get into it). Look at the tax brackets; nothing is taxed even close to 50%

Russian House Music

Well, I don't know how to say this but...I'm pregnant. . . . . . . April Fools! Oh haha, I bet you were freaking out. What a hilarious joke. Sadly that was my first and only prank this April Fools Day - if you can call that a prank (some would say it's a cry for help). My roommate has been away for a few days as a Mock Trial tournament in Chicago. I was considering covering one of his walls with mirrors. I thought it would be funny, but other people disagreed. So I nixed it. April Fools Day seems to be a dying art.

I spent most of this weekend being academically-minded. My goal was to get a very rough draft of my Antitrust paper done by the end of the weekend. I succeeded. Huzzah! I also have to go back and make sure anything I said makes sense but that is Future Will's problem.
Saturday I accompanied Ron and his team to see the Jessup final round. In a classic Cold War match up, we had Moscow versus Columbia (university, not country). Just like the Cold War, Moscow won (wait, what?) but best oralist went to Columbia. It was good to see the top two teams, to see what makes great oral advocacy. This could not have been more in contrast to the 1L moot court competition I had to judge this afternoon. Actually the 1Ls I saw were surprisingly good. I was going to play the role of Justice Thomas (" ") or be a jerk, but I ended up being a benevolent judge. It's good resume building for being a benevolent dictator of a small island nation, preferably.

DC needs to get good non-gourmet pizza. Good take-out pizza.
So generally at the internal moot court competitions, they serve the judges a nice lunch. Usually sandwiches from Corner Bakery with some coffee, Diet Coke, and cookies. I had just run and I was excited to scoop some turkey avocado. Instead there was Sprite and pizza. Bad pizza. Cardboard pizza. Tiny little flat slices so greasy they stuck to the box pizza. What the hell is that?
Later today, I went to Damien's to begin the new season of "Game of Thrones." I was pumped because not only was the show starting back up, they were going to have a bar-b-q. They did not. They ordered pizza. Not quite as gross, but still bad pizza. I'd give it a 3. (Dear pizza company, pizza traditionally comes with more than a hint of cheese. It's not like Hint of Lime Tostitos.) What I'm saying is that DC needs to clean up its act and get some pizza that doesn't require you to be hammered at 1 am to taste good.

At the behest of Ron and his teammates, Friday night I went to Russia House. This time I actually remember it clearly. It still has huge Russian guys in black just standing there. "You need to move drink." "Yessir. I will move my drink." I've never felt so simultaneously safe and unsafe. The entire thing makes you wonder if it's a front. But I felt right at home because they were playing "The Patriot" on the tv. Talk about a mismatch. Really Russia House has hilarious Eurotrash. And Russian house music grows on you after a while. I'm not proud to admit it, but it's true.

Oral Arguments

So Washington is crazy with the Affordable Care Act at the Supreme Court. Today is Day 2 of oral arguments. Wish I could have gone, but I was not prepared to line up beginning last Friday morning. On the upside, professional line-standers (yes, that's a real thing) are making a killing. (Oh, it would be so ironic if someone got sick from standing in line in the rain and had to charge it to their health insurance company at the hospital.) I'm taking a nerd poll on how this case comes out. I say they uphold the law 6-3 with Scalia, Thomas, and Alito dissenting and a narrower holding than liberals would like. But what I was really hoping would happen was Thomas breaking his vow of silence from the bench and making that the story. I wonder how many of my professors were at the arguments today? A bunch, is my non-technical guess.

Instead of being at oral arguments at the Court, yesterday I attended Ron's oral argument at Jessup internationals. He was actually awesome. And not just because I'm his friend and was rooting for him. He had no notes and busted out the equivalent of an oral string cite, with about eight cases he just pulled out from memory. He might as well have walked over and slapped his opponent in the face while singing "Ball so hard..." His partner also did really well, and in fairness so did his opponents. But I have a feeling his team won that round.
Then today I had an oral argument of my own, volunteering to defend (gasp) Congress for my Separation of Powers class. Gun so hard... But my professor was happy that I had volunteered, and it was sort of neat acquainting myself with the issues involved. It was essentially a mock negotiation between Congress and the Executive branch over subpoenaed documents. The negotiation is based on the real-life fact pattern of Congressional oversight of the Clinton Justice Department's handling of campaign finance violations in the 1996 election. As my professor introduced the facts, "Some of you may remember this, and some of you may have been playing with Transformers."
I think it went pretty well. It was kind of fun arguing for Congress. Part of my argument essentially was "You really should just hand over the documents we want. I'll remind you we have the power to appropriate funds. I'm not saying we will deny your appropriations. But I'm also not not saying that." Being a member of Congress is sort of like being a mafia boss from what I gather. The major difference being you have no extra obligations on the day of your daughter's wedding. Oh, and Congressmen get a great pension. But really, it illustrated just how broad Congress's powers are and how many tools they have - both political and legal - to get what they want. Of course, the proper test in a situation of a congressional subpoena vs. a claim of executive privilege is a balancing of each branch's interests; often the result comes from your inherent trust or mistrust of one branch. So people who grew up with Watergate might prefer Congress; people who grew up with McCarthyism might prefer the Executive. And people who grew up with President Bush and the current Congress might prefer anarchy.

Grammar, People

I don't mean to be dramatic, but I am having a real problem here. I was reading a law review article written by my favorite professor (who happens to be my Separation of Powers professor), and I found a problem. Everyone, what is the plural of attorney general?
Right, it is attorneys general. Not attorney generals. But this article uses the incorrect plural. I don't even know what to think right now.

Sweater Is Better. No Stealing.

Drunk fantasy baseball drafts are probably not the way to win the season.

Happy first day of spring. I began the day quite early, being woken up by a huge clap of thunder. I began the day for the second time also quite early, since construction on the building diagonally across from mine begins at 7:15 am. Yeah, that construction really might result in me moving. I began my day for the third time at a reasonable hour, but an unreasonable humidity. It's only March 20th, and I already find it oppressively humid in DC. A bad harbinger. Also, I'm just a New England boy. If you can go outside without a jacket before April, I disapprove. Honestly, it is t-shirt weather already. I wish it stayed colder because, well, I love wearing sweaters. They are probably my favorite clothing item. The more days I can wear a sweater, the better. I think I have a slogan here: Sweater is Better. (c) 2012.

It's nice out so I think I'm just going to listen to Sublime. Does anyone else just feel that compulsion?

Apparently a picture is circulating comparing my Antitrust professor to Dwight Schrute. The comparison is apt to an unfortunate degree. Tonight's class was supposed to be about the recent AT&T - T-Mobile attempted merger. Instead, we got a 90 minute lecture on this history of the telecommunications industry in the United States. Then fifteen minutes of merger discussion, followed by fifteen minutes of observations we have heard three times before. It would be infuriating, but I'm so used to it.
So for a change I am looking at it on the bright side. Rather than being mad about a prolonged tangent, I learned a lot about the history of the telecom industry. And rather than completely tune out, I did some listening. With my ears. Really what I am trying to say is: at least I wasn't sitting through Trusts & Estates.

One paper and three exams. Just keep telling myself that. For graduation, I think we get poofy sleees.

Surprisingly Tame St. Patrick's Day

So the weekend was highlighted by a brief visit from Matt Hope and a surprisingly calm St. Patrick's Day. Matt came to visit from Phillie during his spring break. Turns out Ph.D. students get spring break just like everyone else. Maybe they do have souls. It was great to see him - we ate bar-b-q, went to the bar, and got bar-b-q stomach aches. And reminisced about old times. I miss college, though I am about ready to be done with school after 19th grade.

"Motherlover" is heinously overrated.

St. Patrick's Day was an 11-hour apartment crawl. I kept a surprisingly even consumption pace, and easily avoided being one of those people puking in the street. Cause I wasn't on a street! Just kidding - it's because I drank responsibly like all those commercials tell me to. I hopped around with Ryan, Steph, Kerry, Puja, and a few other people. The highlight of the day was Shannon's boyfriend James getting drunk and becoming the most sarcastic person in the world. Eight (unwanted) drunk girls (really, they were not welcome) stopped by our apartment and Ryan suggested we play Kings. So we get literally three cards into the game when:
Drunk Girl: Oh, I know this great game we should play!
James: Oh could we do that right now? Let's just stop this game. Or would you rather just change the rules right now? What do Jacks do?
From then on every time the girl opened her mouth, James was sarcastically supportive and she was drunk enough to think he was totally on her side. I just laughed until Drunk Girls 1 through 8 finally left.

Tonight, my neighbors (from home) are in DC doing college tours. So I got taken out to dinner and chose District Commons. I had low expectations (take that, Dickens!) since last time I tried to eat there I was given a lot of attitude by a hostess for expecting to sit at a table without a reservation. There were fourteen empty tables, none of which I was allowed at. But my visit was pleasantly surprising. Turns out once you get by the hostess station, it's a good restaurant. Good food, quick and friendly service. And I didn't pay. What's not to like? Oh, the hostess. But we're over that, right? Right?? So District Commons gets a web redemption. (Apparently Daniel Tosh is my celebrity look-alike and act-alike).

My San Francisco Trip. In More Detail Than You Want

So I would've updated from San Francisco but Blake, in a moment of incredible silliness, forgot his wireless internet password. It's a good thing I have one, because I was relegated to my iPhone for internet access for most of the trip. Blake, that deserves a fist shake. There, I shook my fist. Internet problems aside, San Francisco was a ton of fun. Real quick recap
Tuesday - arrived and met up with Dave, who saw Will Ferrell in a Starbucks at the airport. I clearly arrived too late. Once we got to the city, we (the gang - Dave, Blake, and Emma, as well as Dylan, Blake's roommate, oh and Kool-get it?) went to the Mission for some delicious burritos. Then we hit up a bar called the Rio whose main attractions were terrible margaritas and even worse live music. And a cat roaming around the patio. We lasted for two rounds at that bar before moving on to find greener pastures. We settled on heading to a party hosted by some girl Emma knows (read: "knows"). After listening to Blake complain about the bus system for twelve minutes, Emma decided to try to catch the bus. Blake and Dylan decided they weren't going along and headed towards the BART station (yes, San Francisco's subway is named after a Simpsons character). I followed Blake, and we ended up near the party waaaay before Emma and the rest. So we went to another bar before heading to the party. The party ended up being a bunch of drunk modern hippies sitting around a bonfire trying to make s'mores. Life lesson: marshmallow is a bad chaser for whiskey. The fire was pretty fun though - marshmallows, guitar, a burn victim, and Blake tackling Dave. My clothes smelled like smoke for the next fifteen hours, but it was well worth it.

Wednesday - Emma and Blake had work. Lame. Dave and I met up with his roommate Sam, and the three of us did touristy things. We walked around the Embarcadero, Fisherman's Wharf, and the Pier. We saw a man try to scare a seal off the dock. Wildlife abound. After a desperate search for somewhere to pee, we ate a much anticipated meal at In N' Out Burger. People from the West Coast love it. I've heard much praise. And honestly, it wasn't that great. Maybe it was my sobriety. Or maybe I just didn't drink the In N' Out Kool-Aid. I don't really get the hype. Chipotle hype seems more legitimate. I mean, the burger was just fine. The "animal style" fries were sort of gross. It was far from the mind-blowing experience I expected. Our next stop was recommended by my mom, of all people: the Buena Vista, famous for its Irish coffee. And I'll say, the Irish coffee did exactly the opposite of In N' Out burger; it totally rocked my world. Best Irish coffee I've ever had. Heck, the Buena Vista was even mentioned in a recent NYTimes article about Irish coffee. At night the gang headed out to a New York style deli (chosen by Blake - why is that what I want to eat when I head out west?) and a couple bars. The first bar, Kozy Kar, had centerfolds all over and classic tv interspersed with porn on tv. It really wasn't the perfect set-up, so we moved on to playing pool at an Irish bar. Emma put metal on the jukebox and scared away customers, leaving Blake and Dave to apologize to the bartender. Way to go.

Thursday - (wow this is getting long. I'll try to shorten it up) Again with the work for Emma and Blake, leaving Dave and me to fend for ourselves. I had lunch with my cousin at the Embarcardero and bought twelve dollar jeans. I was proud of myself. That evening, Dave and I ventured out to an Italian restaurant called Ideale and a fantastic bar called the Comstock Saloon. The Comstock was on the GQ top 25 cocktail bars list, and it absolutely lived up to its billing. I had the best Sazerac of my life, and a really good Blood and Sand. Then we met up with Emma to watch fire spinners. As in, people spinning sticks that were on fire. Apparently it's a popular hobby? But it was pretty cool to watch. However, the highlight of the night was one of Emma's friends letting me use his bullwhip. I'll be damned if I didn't hum the Indiana Jones theme song to myself as I attempted to crack the whip without smacking myself in the face (I succeeded!) It was epic. I think I have to purchase a bullwhip now. It's just about the coolest thing I've ever held. Dave got a hotel room with his girlfriend (too long a story - he can get his own blog if he wants to tell it), so Emma and I got some bomb nachos and went back to Blake's. Long story short, I ended up drinking with Blake and his girlfriend until 4 am (7 am EST, which is the time I was on). And Thursday mergers into...

Friday - where I woke up drunk after about five hours of sleep. What a miserable feeling! Oh god! It's somehow worse than the "I'm never drinking again" feeling. Blake took the day off and he, Dave, and I went to Haight St. Apparently there are no laws in San Francisco and you can drink and smoke a bowl in public. Saw lots of that. And a drum circle in the park at the end of Haight, which I think is Golden Gate Park. Nothing causes righteous anger like a drum circle. (Side note: I really have never smelled as much pot just walking around the street. It's totally crazy for me to wrap my mind around. I guess I'm not 'chill' and 'mellow' enough to find it normal. Don't you all have jobs?? What are you doing smoking a joint in the middle of the day walking down the street?) In the middle of Haight, I started feeling a lot better (how is not fit to print). We went to the Alembic, another of GQ's chosen cocktail bars, where I had a good pisco sour. Maybe it was the context (not feeling well, middle of the afternoon, bartender's bad attitude), but the Alembic was not as good as Comstock Saloon. Take a note of that. Still a fun bar. After Haight, we went for dinner in the Mission. Blake ordered a pitcher of margaritas and berated me for an hour that I wasn't day drinking with him. How dare he take a day off and I refuse to drink away my hangover? So while Blake and Dave engaged in some competitive margarita drinking, I ate a taco salad and felt a lot better. That night the gang went to a funk show at the Independent. Now, we thought we were going to see Dumpstafunk (not that it means anything to me), but the opening band just kept playing. And playing. Their first three or so songs I was fine with. Then I got annoyed, but I found solace in the fact that they were just the opening band and would end shortly. I was wrong. They played for at least an hour and a half. I went through the entire emotional spectrum: excitement -> annoyance -> anger -> denial -> acceptance -> funkytown. But by the time I got to funkytown, everyone else got to anger. Who was I to stop everyone from leaving a funk show where we had already put in 90 minutes? So we left, went to a crappy bar, and I got about 4 hours of sleep before my flight. The next day Southwest almost let me miss my flight, but that's not as good a story.

And that's quite long enough for that post. More later. Sufficed to say, I am back in DC, the weather is beautiful, and I have little to no drive to do my reading. In fact, this week I just skipped my Trusts & Estates reading. And no hellfire rained down. Nothing bad happened to me. I think this may be the start of a whole new outlook on life.

Costco is a great place

I would say the highlight of my weekend was going to Costco. If only to congratulate myself for the awesome purchase of a 24-pack of Guinness in preparation for St. Patrick's Day. What forethought I have. Oh thanks, me. Between that and an industrial-sized pack of Cliff Bars, I feel that I made out like a bandit. Not to mention that cheap pizza and hot dog I had from their vendor. The $1.50 hot dog-soda combo they offer restores my faith in humanity. I love knowing they can profitably sell that delicious due to me every time I visit.

Besides that, it was mostly research for my antitrust paper and being weirdly tired. Damn you, coal industry for being unnecessarily opaque in terms of production and pricing data. You are making my paper much more difficult to research. Sounds thrilling already, doesn't it? Oh, you want more? Well I am writing about a merger between coal firms in the Southern Powder River Basin of Wyoming, the largest coal-producing region in the country. I know it's thrilling. Please, hold your applause.

My plane ride tomorrow will be full of coal mergers and editing 2L note drafts. 'Cause I'm going to San Francisco! I believe the appropriate words are "Oh yeah!" I'm meeting up with Dave and staying with Blake and Emma. It's going to be magical. In preparation I've been listening to nothing but "Sittin' on the Dock of the Bay". Now I am curiously depressed to visit California. I'll have to mix in a little "California Love" and "California Dreaming." And "California Girls." Hey, why are there so many songs about California? And so many movies? They think they are better than the rest of us?! Well listen up hippies, I'm coming to prove you wrong. This thought took a belligerent turn. It needs more Tupac. And the Eagles!

Alright, I have to pack. But I promise there will be California updates.

Free Day

I have to compliment my Banana Republic experience today. I went to Nana Pubs because Shaked sent me a 40% off coupon and I need jeans. I went to the one in Metro Center and met up with Kerry. We walked in and were immediately offered free manhattans. Free cocktails? What's going on? Little did we know that we were walking into the Mad Men line release party. Free drinks, little appetizers being offered as you shop; what a great shopping experience. It made me totally not care that they didn't have the jeans I wanted in my size. But come to think of it, that's pretty weird. I'm a really common size. What kind of self-respecting Banana Republic doesn't have jeans for me? One that serves cocktails apparently, so I am actually fine with that trade-off.
Then on the bus ride back home the fare reader was broken so I got a free ride. And at dinner I got a free cold shoulder from the bartenders. Fifteen minutes without so much as looking at me. The service is consistently awful at Chef Geoff's. Well, our server was good actually. So they aren't even consistent. But look, if you are planning on not serving anyone drinks for the last fifteen minutes of happy hour, just make happy hour end at 6:45 instead of 7.

Spring break is so close. Two classes away. I'm going to San Francisco to visit Emma and Blake. For some reason the inevitable reaction when I tell anyone that is "Have you been there before?" Why is that your first reaction? Yes, yes I have. So what? No one asks me if I've been there before when I go to Boston or New York. Is the west coast some otherworldly place with unicorns and leprechauns? Well...California is sort of some otherwordly place with hippies and medical marijuana. And a bridge made of gold, I hear. Oh no wait - I've been there and seen it. Maybe everyone asks so that if I say "no" they can make up lies to tell me about California. That's what I'm going to do whenever someone tells me they are going somewhere for the first time. "Oh you are going to Prague? Make sure you check out the wizard society. They own a lighting bolt-shaped building in the exact geographic center of the city. And when you see the dog that looks exactly like Pluto riding a unicycle, don't be alarmed. He is a national treasure to them, so no pictures."

Sadie came to visit a couple weeks ago. Baller. Ok, well she really came to interview for grad school and hung out with me also, but that's neither here nor there. It was good seeing her. Except that the first night she was here she refused to go out with me. She insisted on sleeping. This from the girl who used to have a full week of parties at her house during high school? Disappointing. The next night she was definitely more of a gamer. We walked around Georgetown, went to dinner, and played skee ball at Buffalo. She also introduced me to "Party Down" (or at least made the show amusing for me - I think it's better to watch with someone else). It sounds like she's been living the life in Austin. Everything is cheap, nice weather, good people, what more could you want?
The other amusing part of her visit was actually due to my roommate who came back very drunk one night. He met Sadie and then proceeded to rant about 1) republicans in general, 2) Rick Santorum, and 3) how he doesn't understand transgender people. Sadie, of course, went to transgender university, Wesleyan. She did a great job of trying to make him understand the thought process behind it. It totally would have worked on a sober person. But Ryan just kept shouting "I'm sorry, I just don't get it. Why would you want that?" That was really the only answer.

Valentines Day in Class

Happy Valentines Day. I spent this evening not out to dinner, but rather in my Antitrust Seminar. Whoop-dee-freaking-do. The class is supposed to be about mergers, so how did we end up with my professor ranting about the Federal Reserve Board's groupthink decision-making pre-2007? I really couldn't tell you. I think I took three lines of notes in the entire two hour class. And all three lines were just because I felt like I should write something.
And if he explains to me what a heuristic is one more time, I might throw my laptop.

That's really all I've got.

I'm actually in a fairly good mood. I just don't know how to show it. Sadie's coming on Thursday night. My Trusts and Estates cold call went well. Fantasy baseball is starting. How bad could it be?

My Finger!

Last night I hacked off a small portion of my pinkie finger with a mandolin. It was the bloodiest injury I've sustained in years. I feel so hardcore now, with my X-Men bandaid and whatnot. I'm basically a member of the 300. While continuing to chop an onion after my horrific injury, I screamed "This. Is. Sparta.!!!!!"
Note: I don't actually have an X-Men bandaid. I'm not cool enough for that. Just a regular CVS brand one.

Just finished the "Hunger Games." According to Shaked, it shouldn't have taken me so long. The book was pretty good. I'd call it a page turner. Some enemies become friends, a girl learns a lot about herself, and a large number of small children die in horrific ways. Hrm. It's pretty brutal for what I'd call a young-adult book. A bit more gruesome than the Hardy Boys.
I have been informed that the second and third books are not worth it, so my work seems like it ends here.

I watched a lot of the Grammies last night for the first time in many years. My initial reaction was that there isn't a ton of good, popular music being released these days. Another reaction is that Chris Brown is a douchebag. I'd find it a lot easier to accept him back to the Grammies if his performances didn't suck.
Also, if the Foo Fighters are really the premier "Hard Rock" band these days, then we have fallen into a sad state of affairs indeed. I like the guy, but I didn't need to see Dave Grohl perform 4 times - none of it particularly good. Though props for wearing a Slayer shirt.
Adele...you sly fox. Does anyone really hate Adele? I guess I can see her ex-boyfriend not liking her. But besides that, I think she's universally accepted as good. But it always pains me to see an award show roll over and die for one artist like that.

Tonight at the Kennedy Center tonight I sat in a box. The entire time I was waiting for John Wilkes Booth to dash in and shoot me.

In Computer Crimes we were assigned to watch a clip of "To Catch A Predator."

Secret Holds

Well today's Antitrust class was interesting. My professor arrived six minutes late, put his bag down, then left to get a soda. Two minutes later his Diet Coke exploded upon opening it. The next hour and fifty-two minutes of the class was purportedly about the independence of antitrust enforcement agencies. But if I had to title the lecture it would be "I hate the Senate's confirmation process." While he did talk a bit about "the law" and cases like Humphrey's Executor, far more time was spent disparaging the current Senate, the process of putting holds on nominees, and the disclosure procedures that nominees must go through. He's a former FTC Commissioner, and apparently he has a number of grievances. But he does know what he's talking about. It was an amusing, if less than enlightening, class period.

We are now in the shadow period of sports. A time where nothing I care about is going on. Damn it, February. Also, why do I have to pay full rent this month? I guess the leap year helps, but I am still full of resentment.

Is it racist that Black History Month is the shortest month of the year?

Facebook memes have to be reigned in. It's all getting too much. My news feed is exploding with not-so-funny captioned pictures.

It's Really My Fault

I'll take the blame for the Patriots Super Bowl loss. Me, right here. This guy. I put on my Tom Brady jersey and wore it for the first quarter. I knew I shouldn't have. I caused this. I wore that jersey the last time we played the Giants, earlier this season, and we lost. I didn't wear it again until the playoff game against the Ravens - and we won despite our best efforts. So I should have known it was the bad luck jersey and kept it in the closet. But no, I had to go dragging it out to show my New England pride. Damn you, hubris. I apologize to Belichick, Brady, Welker, and the rest of them. I am sorry I selfishly wore that jersey and caused that dismal loss.

On the plus side of the Super Bowl, we had a party at my apartment with two tvs! That's twice the number of tvs you probably watched the game on. How did I pull that off, you might ask. Well I don't mind telling you it was a combination of laziness (failing to post the old tv on Craigslist for a few months), elbow grease (or re-wiring RCN service), and good old American work ethic (yeah!).
Since my roommate is a Giants fan, we were quite the house divided. I think Giants fans outnumbered Patriots fans 6 to 5, with another 7 people whose main attractions to the game were beer and salsa. In my book, some people (my roommate) deserve a penalty for excessive celebration. But the losers took their defeat with grace and poise. No one even punched a wall or destroyed a door. My response was doing dishes (conveniently aided by remembering I have a dishwasher and using it for the first time in two and a half years - no joke), drinking a beer, and watching Game of Thrones.

I paid attention to more than half of my Trusts and Estates class today. I relish the small victories.

I got a haircut today and got my barber in trouble with the head barber, for lack of a better term. With Diego, whose establishment it is. I unknowingly skipped ahead of a guy with an appointment. Sorry doode. Me and my barber are thick as thieves. Mostly because I've always wanted to say that. But he's a good guy and I gave him extra tip for getting him in trouble. That's the appropriate response, right? I can honestly say I had never seen a barber get disciplined. It wasn't a pretty sight. There was hair everywhere.

I did not understand what "Semi-Charmed Kinda Life" was about until much later

So last weekend was fun, but rough. Thursday (yes, that's the beginning of the weekend) was a fun bar review at Marvin. I went to a total of two bar reviews last semester, so I am enjoying no longer having an internship. Saturday was the Lamb of God show, which was awesome - the best way to get out some aggression and feel at peace with the world. And Sunday was a really, really...really messy brunch. I am not even thinking about alcohol until Friday thanks to brunch.

I decided to pass/fail my Trusts & Estates class. Mostly because I cannot, for the life of me, pay attention for more than a few sentences. Some days listening to a full sentence is quite the task. I tried really hard to pay attention today. But my professor spent 35 minutes discussing the details of the execution ceremony for a will. Which the book already did in our reading. And which is mostly common sense. When the statute says that the testator must watch the witnesses sign, it's not difficult to understand that you should probably have them all in the same room. Now the professor is perfectly nice. But. But...he just moves so slowly. He is the tortoise, and my mind is the hare. So pass/failing the class, it doesn't matter if I don't finish first. I just can't finish C- or below.

What's your favorite song featuring Jay-Z? I'm proud to say that mine is Mariah Carey's "Heartbreaker."
What's your favorite 90's song? "Semi-Charmed Kinda Life"
Man, I love superlatives. It's probably my favorite game.

Tomorrow I get to see Justice Kagan judging a moot court competition. A reception follows the oral arguments. However true, it might not be a good idea to go up to her and say, "Hey, I know your niece. She lived on my freshman hall and I heard her having sex all the time. Especially in the morning." That could only be followed up by a hilarious request for assistance procuring a clerkship.
Inappropriateness aside, it is pretty exciting to see a Supreme Court justice doing her thing in person. I wonder if Clarence Thomas would talk while presiding over a moot court. Scotty doesn't know.

Newt Gingrich strongly reminds me of Jabba the Hut. I really hope that isn't just me.

Shaked sent me the Gordon Ramsay autobiography, perhaps to further my man-crush. He is super British and swears almost as much in his writing as in his speech. It's awesome!