Beginning of the End

So here I am on the verge of a new semester. The next semester. The last semester I will ever have to deal with. Presumably. Who knows, maybe I'll go back and get a Ph.D in philosophy and ride out my days as a college professor. Regardless, tomorrow my last semester of law school begins. How do I feel? I want to click my heels together at the thought of ending this nightmare of a school. But mostly I don't want to go back to class.
My classes are: Antitrust Seminar, Trusts and Estates, Computer Crime, and Separation of Powers. No class before 11, no class on Fridays. It's sort of like a college schedule. And I get to pass/fail one of the classes. Woo! All my professors are supposed to be good, so I am...hopeful? As hopeful as I can be after having done my first reading assignment in a month. It wasn't great. My brain sort of forgot how to read anything that isn't the New York Times or a Game of Thrones sequel.

I am starting classes tomorrow, and still only have two out of my four grades back from last semester. I find that pretty disrespectful. My last assignment for Public Interest Lawyering was due at the beginning of December. There were two professors and only twelve students in that class. And they still can't give me a damn grade?! I'm sure grading isn't fun, but it's the professors' job. Just do it!

I am rapidly becoming addicted to Amazon.com. The iPhone app doesn't help anything. I'm just jonesing to use my Amazon Prime free shipping.

More than the sex talk, I'm afraid to explain to my children how the stock market works. "Daddy, what's a stock?" is sort of a difficult question. "Daddy, what's an independent public offering?" How do you explain that to a seven year old? I'm not sure I totally know myself! "So Toys R' Us issues stock, and if you buy the stock then you own a tiny piece of that company. And if they do well then you can share in their profits. That's why I bought you that damn Tickle Me Elmo." "Daddy, what's the CFTC?" Don't even get me started on futures markets, junior.

Today I bought my first Brooks Brothers shirts (because they were having a 50% off sale). They are...so nice. I feel like a classy gentleman wearing them. Not a bad start to a professional wardrobe. I'm going to purchase large, leather-bound books to match. Maybe a red velvet smoking jacket. The cotton is so soft I'm considering using a shirt as a pillow case. Alright, now we are going overboard, but you get the picture.
Maybe someday I'll get one of their ties with the golden fleece and officially submit my application to the WASP club.
But really, the shirts are awesome. And I'll never be a WASP because I just bragged about how I got them on sale...