Thursday, January 12, 2012
And Another Thing
One more grievance: my school automatically takes out $50 from my loans as a "library donation" each semester. I just learned about this - they don't really tell us about it. What kind of CRAP is that? Apparently you can opt out of it. I want to go demand my money back from every semester I "generously donated" to the library. Jeez, next time at least buy me dinner first!
Felonious and Intentional
The Starbuck iPhone app is probably the bougiest thing invented to date.
I'll talk about my current classes soon. But as my grades come back from last semester, I'd like to say they are absolute crap. In both ways. I did better than I should have in some classes and worse in others (namely Pubic Interest Lawyering - a BS class that I still didn't do particularly well in. Why?! I have no idea). At least I finally got my grades. I'm not sure how much they matter at all. But I still have that Type A thing inside of me somewhere driving me to achieve. I blame my upbringing. "Blame."
I have an awful case of senioritis. Or anger. In Trusts and Estates, I completely tuned out for the first 45 minutes of class. That half of class could have been summed up in one sentence. Instead, we spent 45 minutes on a relatively simple case, the Model Probate Code (which only a handful of jurisdictions follow), and pointless hypotheticals. If you were wondering, here is the one sentence explanation: A person may not inherit from someone he killed if the killing was felonious and intentional. Bam - done. Now, felonious and intentional are certainly legal terms of art- but we learned about them first semester 1L year in Criminal Law. Not difficult. This one sentence absolutely did not merit half a class. So I tuned out. From time to time I would remember that I was supposed to be paying attention and tune in, but I only had the attention span to hear half a sentence at a time. I got a lot of dependent clauses in there. Regardless, I missed absolutely nothing.
Honestly, it sort of brought my entire day down. Like Angry Sandwich Lady to Matt Hope, that class messed up my whole day.
I'll talk about my current classes soon. But as my grades come back from last semester, I'd like to say they are absolute crap. In both ways. I did better than I should have in some classes and worse in others (namely Pubic Interest Lawyering - a BS class that I still didn't do particularly well in. Why?! I have no idea). At least I finally got my grades. I'm not sure how much they matter at all. But I still have that Type A thing inside of me somewhere driving me to achieve. I blame my upbringing. "Blame."
I have an awful case of senioritis. Or anger. In Trusts and Estates, I completely tuned out for the first 45 minutes of class. That half of class could have been summed up in one sentence. Instead, we spent 45 minutes on a relatively simple case, the Model Probate Code (which only a handful of jurisdictions follow), and pointless hypotheticals. If you were wondering, here is the one sentence explanation: A person may not inherit from someone he killed if the killing was felonious and intentional. Bam - done. Now, felonious and intentional are certainly legal terms of art- but we learned about them first semester 1L year in Criminal Law. Not difficult. This one sentence absolutely did not merit half a class. So I tuned out. From time to time I would remember that I was supposed to be paying attention and tune in, but I only had the attention span to hear half a sentence at a time. I got a lot of dependent clauses in there. Regardless, I missed absolutely nothing.
Honestly, it sort of brought my entire day down. Like Angry Sandwich Lady to Matt Hope, that class messed up my whole day.
Sunday, January 8, 2012
Beginning of the End
So here I am on the verge of a new semester. The next semester. The last semester I will ever have to deal with. Presumably. Who knows, maybe I'll go back and get a Ph.D in philosophy and ride out my days as a college professor. Regardless, tomorrow my last semester of law school begins. How do I feel? I want to click my heels together at the thought of ending this nightmare of a school. But mostly I don't want to go back to class.
My classes are: Antitrust Seminar, Trusts and Estates, Computer Crime, and Separation of Powers. No class before 11, no class on Fridays. It's sort of like a college schedule. And I get to pass/fail one of the classes. Woo! All my professors are supposed to be good, so I am...hopeful? As hopeful as I can be after having done my first reading assignment in a month. It wasn't great. My brain sort of forgot how to read anything that isn't the New York Times or a Game of Thrones sequel.
I am starting classes tomorrow, and still only have two out of my four grades back from last semester. I find that pretty disrespectful. My last assignment for Public Interest Lawyering was due at the beginning of December. There were two professors and only twelve students in that class. And they still can't give me a damn grade?! I'm sure grading isn't fun, but it's the professors' job. Just do it!
I am rapidly becoming addicted to Amazon.com. The iPhone app doesn't help anything. I'm just jonesing to use my Amazon Prime free shipping.
More than the sex talk, I'm afraid to explain to my children how the stock market works. "Daddy, what's a stock?" is sort of a difficult question. "Daddy, what's an independent public offering?" How do you explain that to a seven year old? I'm not sure I totally know myself! "So Toys R' Us issues stock, and if you buy the stock then you own a tiny piece of that company. And if they do well then you can share in their profits. That's why I bought you that damn Tickle Me Elmo." "Daddy, what's the CFTC?" Don't even get me started on futures markets, junior.
Today I bought my first Brooks Brothers shirts (because they were having a 50% off sale). They are...so nice. I feel like a classy gentleman wearing them. Not a bad start to a professional wardrobe. I'm going to purchase large, leather-bound books to match. Maybe a red velvet smoking jacket. The cotton is so soft I'm considering using a shirt as a pillow case. Alright, now we are going overboard, but you get the picture.
Maybe someday I'll get one of their ties with the golden fleece and officially submit my application to the WASP club.
But really, the shirts are awesome. And I'll never be a WASP because I just bragged about how I got them on sale...
My classes are: Antitrust Seminar, Trusts and Estates, Computer Crime, and Separation of Powers. No class before 11, no class on Fridays. It's sort of like a college schedule. And I get to pass/fail one of the classes. Woo! All my professors are supposed to be good, so I am...hopeful? As hopeful as I can be after having done my first reading assignment in a month. It wasn't great. My brain sort of forgot how to read anything that isn't the New York Times or a Game of Thrones sequel.
I am starting classes tomorrow, and still only have two out of my four grades back from last semester. I find that pretty disrespectful. My last assignment for Public Interest Lawyering was due at the beginning of December. There were two professors and only twelve students in that class. And they still can't give me a damn grade?! I'm sure grading isn't fun, but it's the professors' job. Just do it!
I am rapidly becoming addicted to Amazon.com. The iPhone app doesn't help anything. I'm just jonesing to use my Amazon Prime free shipping.
More than the sex talk, I'm afraid to explain to my children how the stock market works. "Daddy, what's a stock?" is sort of a difficult question. "Daddy, what's an independent public offering?" How do you explain that to a seven year old? I'm not sure I totally know myself! "So Toys R' Us issues stock, and if you buy the stock then you own a tiny piece of that company. And if they do well then you can share in their profits. That's why I bought you that damn Tickle Me Elmo." "Daddy, what's the CFTC?" Don't even get me started on futures markets, junior.
Today I bought my first Brooks Brothers shirts (because they were having a 50% off sale). They are...so nice. I feel like a classy gentleman wearing them. Not a bad start to a professional wardrobe. I'm going to purchase large, leather-bound books to match. Maybe a red velvet smoking jacket. The cotton is so soft I'm considering using a shirt as a pillow case. Alright, now we are going overboard, but you get the picture.
Maybe someday I'll get one of their ties with the golden fleece and officially submit my application to the WASP club.
But really, the shirts are awesome. And I'll never be a WASP because I just bragged about how I got them on sale...
Thursday, January 5, 2012
Virgin America Has A Terrible Website
Last night I was walking down the street and I heard something I'd never heard before. This woman talking to her friend says, "You know who I really like is Newt Gingrich!" It was not said ironically. That's honestly a first.
New Years in New York came and went. It was fun to see people - Jonah, Jessie, Caitlin, etc. It was much more low-key than last year. For example, I didn't get hammered and run around the apartment screaming profanities at anyone who would listen. The funniest thing that happened was McGrath bringing 101 proof peppermint-berry liqueur and making everyone have a shot of it. It was honestly the most disgusting drink I have ever tasted. It made me want to puke immediately. Then I watched McGrath singlehandedly finish the bottle. Next (unsurprisingly) he vomited.
The next day I saw my cousin. And a huge subway rat feasting on discarded sushi. My cousin's company was more pleasant, if I implied any comparison there.
I took the Megabus with Kerry back from New York. The bus was a double decker and we sat in the very front of the bottom level. In the middle of the bumper to bumper traffic that plagued New Jersey I was reading a book. Out of the corner of my eye I saw some liquid fall from the top level down the stairs. I thought it was water or something. Yeah...turned out it was vomit. A passenger upstairs had gotten motion sickness and projectile vomited down the stairs. Luckily it was not terrifically smelly vomit - more of the not smelly type. We pulled into a rest stop for her, adding to our already 2 hour delay. Normally I would be furious, but I figured things could be worse: I could be the woman who vomited. I took a deep breath and saved my anger for later.
For things like Republicans. Rick Santorum?! Are you serious Iowans? Is that a goddamn joke? He is a lunatic. A right-wing, radical, hateful, hypocritical lunatic.
Mitt Romney is the eventual nominee. There's just no way around that. Better get used to the idea. My favorite thing about Republicans is that they have so much ridiculous religious zealotry that they many cannot even stomach a Mormon nominee.
For now, I'm trying to enjoy the last few days before my last semester of school. Ever.
New Years in New York came and went. It was fun to see people - Jonah, Jessie, Caitlin, etc. It was much more low-key than last year. For example, I didn't get hammered and run around the apartment screaming profanities at anyone who would listen. The funniest thing that happened was McGrath bringing 101 proof peppermint-berry liqueur and making everyone have a shot of it. It was honestly the most disgusting drink I have ever tasted. It made me want to puke immediately. Then I watched McGrath singlehandedly finish the bottle. Next (unsurprisingly) he vomited.
The next day I saw my cousin. And a huge subway rat feasting on discarded sushi. My cousin's company was more pleasant, if I implied any comparison there.
I took the Megabus with Kerry back from New York. The bus was a double decker and we sat in the very front of the bottom level. In the middle of the bumper to bumper traffic that plagued New Jersey I was reading a book. Out of the corner of my eye I saw some liquid fall from the top level down the stairs. I thought it was water or something. Yeah...turned out it was vomit. A passenger upstairs had gotten motion sickness and projectile vomited down the stairs. Luckily it was not terrifically smelly vomit - more of the not smelly type. We pulled into a rest stop for her, adding to our already 2 hour delay. Normally I would be furious, but I figured things could be worse: I could be the woman who vomited. I took a deep breath and saved my anger for later.
For things like Republicans. Rick Santorum?! Are you serious Iowans? Is that a goddamn joke? He is a lunatic. A right-wing, radical, hateful, hypocritical lunatic.
Mitt Romney is the eventual nominee. There's just no way around that. Better get used to the idea. My favorite thing about Republicans is that they have so much ridiculous religious zealotry that they many cannot even stomach a Mormon nominee.
For now, I'm trying to enjoy the last few days before my last semester of school. Ever.
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
Hometown
My hometown is sort of boring. At times, there can be nothing interesting to do. For example, the burrito store was open while the liquor store was closed. Who does that? I was lulled into a false sense of boredom, so Monday night I decided to go to the (only) local bar. Huge mistake since I had no desire to run into acquaintances from high school. I went with Ron and eventually met up with Ryan and Morgan. But in the process, I made awkward eye contact with a few people who had been happily forgotten since high school. Like Becca with the trashy clothes. And what's-her-name with the name that escapes memory. Luckily no conversation was initiated, but it was awkward enough.
It got me prepared a bit for my 10 year high school reunion. (I skipped the 5 year and apparently missed a girl fight.) I think I'll be "successful" at my 10 year reunion. If all goes according to plan and I don't fail out this semester, I'll be a lawyer. And I will have moved out of my hometown. That makes me successful. What else can you hope for at a high school reunion? It seems like the point is to show off how awesome you are now so everyone who didn't like you can reflect on how wrong they were and how much of a jerk that makes them. High school reunions are a big F-U opportunity, or am I missing something? I guess there is the possibility of reigniting long-lost friendship. But given my high school, that seems unlikely.
Speaking of high school people - last night was the traditional elementary school reunion that occurs each year for Rebecca's birthday. Every year Rebecca, Vanessa, Jessica, and I go out to dinner and drinks in Boston to celebrate Rebecca's birthday. We have known each other since kindergarten - except Vanessa who arrived in 2nd grade. Rebecca was one of two people in my elementary school class who was younger than me. Sucka.
We went to a Chinese hot pot restaurant in (shockingly) Chinatown and for drinks at a bar called Scholars. It was all well and good. Two med students, a law student, and a soon to be business student. Pushed to succeed much?
I just heard a commercial that began "Attention women with a muffin top." It was about weight loss - but I don't think it's the most delicate method of reaching the target audience.
"Attention people who love muffin tops. Come to Will's Bakery." Much better.
I just found some of my old Star Wars action figures in my closet. I seriously considered bringing them back down to DC. Maybe just Han Solo and Darth Vader...and the X-Wing? That would look cool in my apartment...no?
It got me prepared a bit for my 10 year high school reunion. (I skipped the 5 year and apparently missed a girl fight.) I think I'll be "successful" at my 10 year reunion. If all goes according to plan and I don't fail out this semester, I'll be a lawyer. And I will have moved out of my hometown. That makes me successful. What else can you hope for at a high school reunion? It seems like the point is to show off how awesome you are now so everyone who didn't like you can reflect on how wrong they were and how much of a jerk that makes them. High school reunions are a big F-U opportunity, or am I missing something? I guess there is the possibility of reigniting long-lost friendship. But given my high school, that seems unlikely.
Speaking of high school people - last night was the traditional elementary school reunion that occurs each year for Rebecca's birthday. Every year Rebecca, Vanessa, Jessica, and I go out to dinner and drinks in Boston to celebrate Rebecca's birthday. We have known each other since kindergarten - except Vanessa who arrived in 2nd grade. Rebecca was one of two people in my elementary school class who was younger than me. Sucka.
We went to a Chinese hot pot restaurant in (shockingly) Chinatown and for drinks at a bar called Scholars. It was all well and good. Two med students, a law student, and a soon to be business student. Pushed to succeed much?
I just heard a commercial that began "Attention women with a muffin top." It was about weight loss - but I don't think it's the most delicate method of reaching the target audience.
"Attention people who love muffin tops. Come to Will's Bakery." Much better.
I just found some of my old Star Wars action figures in my closet. I seriously considered bringing them back down to DC. Maybe just Han Solo and Darth Vader...and the X-Wing? That would look cool in my apartment...no?
Monday, December 26, 2011
Frack
Alright blog, here we go.
Finals being over was clutch. I spent a few days in DC without any real responsibility. Lots of laundry, groceries, and general responsibilities aside, I did little. I have to say, the best night was that Wednesday. I went with my roommate to pub trivia and a whiskey bar, and then we watched "A New Hope." It's really all I've ever wanted in an evening. The only other evening of note was Damien's Christmas Party. Thanks to Dan and Rachel, that night turned into a haze. Dan instigated many many shots of Scandinavian schnapps, one of the few liquors that gets worse with each shot. I just got annoyingly drunk (sorry everyone I was around!). The next morning there was a lovely group text:
Dan: Sorry about that everyone. Thanks for drinking with me
Me: My head...
Rachel: I'm still drunk
Dan: I ended my streak of not puking in DC
Rachel: I ended my streak of not blacking out at dinner parties.
For the record, Rachel's streak only dates back to Damien's Passover dinner party by my count. Whelp, that was DC Christmas.
DC Hanukkah was more of a sober event. It consisted of Ed and me cooking for Alena and Kerry while watching Tim Tebow lose to the Patriots. What up.
Then it was back to Boston, where I currently am. Boston has been, well, rather dull. I've seen some people and that has been nice. Christmas was very traditional: BDP's for Christmas Eve, family friend's for dinner, and Emma's for evening activities. It's as regular as Santa's mad dash around the world. Once again, Santa did not show up for me - even though I have a chimney. How does he know which children are Christian? Does he just go by last name and make all sorts of dangerous assumptions? I mean, Dave Goldberg we can probably cross off the list, but there are tons of ambiguities.
Does anyone actually get coal? That would be awesome. I'd be way more behind the idea of Santa if people actually got coal when they were naughty that year. What a superior system of child discipline. Do rich kids who have been naughty get coal derivatives from a futures market? Was any fracking involved in that coal extraction?
Fracking as a great word. It sounds way better than what it is: a method of extracting coal and natural gas from rock.
For my birthday, Shaked got my How I Met Your Mother (HIMYM) Seasons 4 and 5, but I promised not to watch them until the end of finals. That was a good choice since I would have spent lots more time watching HIMYM than studying. But since finals ended, I have been in a HIMYM marathon. I'm just about at the end of season 5. It's like crack! Even though it's going steadily downhill and slowly consuming my life. Hey, it really is like crack.
So Happy Holidays everyone.
Finals being over was clutch. I spent a few days in DC without any real responsibility. Lots of laundry, groceries, and general responsibilities aside, I did little. I have to say, the best night was that Wednesday. I went with my roommate to pub trivia and a whiskey bar, and then we watched "A New Hope." It's really all I've ever wanted in an evening. The only other evening of note was Damien's Christmas Party. Thanks to Dan and Rachel, that night turned into a haze. Dan instigated many many shots of Scandinavian schnapps, one of the few liquors that gets worse with each shot. I just got annoyingly drunk (sorry everyone I was around!). The next morning there was a lovely group text:
Dan: Sorry about that everyone. Thanks for drinking with me
Me: My head...
Rachel: I'm still drunk
Dan: I ended my streak of not puking in DC
Rachel: I ended my streak of not blacking out at dinner parties.
For the record, Rachel's streak only dates back to Damien's Passover dinner party by my count. Whelp, that was DC Christmas.
DC Hanukkah was more of a sober event. It consisted of Ed and me cooking for Alena and Kerry while watching Tim Tebow lose to the Patriots. What up.
Then it was back to Boston, where I currently am. Boston has been, well, rather dull. I've seen some people and that has been nice. Christmas was very traditional: BDP's for Christmas Eve, family friend's for dinner, and Emma's for evening activities. It's as regular as Santa's mad dash around the world. Once again, Santa did not show up for me - even though I have a chimney. How does he know which children are Christian? Does he just go by last name and make all sorts of dangerous assumptions? I mean, Dave Goldberg we can probably cross off the list, but there are tons of ambiguities.
Does anyone actually get coal? That would be awesome. I'd be way more behind the idea of Santa if people actually got coal when they were naughty that year. What a superior system of child discipline. Do rich kids who have been naughty get coal derivatives from a futures market? Was any fracking involved in that coal extraction?
Fracking as a great word. It sounds way better than what it is: a method of extracting coal and natural gas from rock.
For my birthday, Shaked got my How I Met Your Mother (HIMYM) Seasons 4 and 5, but I promised not to watch them until the end of finals. That was a good choice since I would have spent lots more time watching HIMYM than studying. But since finals ended, I have been in a HIMYM marathon. I'm just about at the end of season 5. It's like crack! Even though it's going steadily downhill and slowly consuming my life. Hey, it really is like crack.
So Happy Holidays everyone.
Monday, December 12, 2011
Final Final
Tomorrow is my last final. In 15 hours, I will be done with my penultimate semester of law school. All that stands in my way is Professional Responsibility. (I hope someone ironically gets thrown out of the exam for cheating.) I cannot wait to be done with over two weeks of constant studying or feeling like I should be studying. Not to mention being done with this crappy semester. Next semester I get to take classes I am interested in with good professors. This semester not so much.
Tomorrow afternoon there is a planned brunch at the bar closest to school. Then a much-deserved nap. The nap isn't group planned.
The Model Rules of Professional Responsibility can be summed up in one sentence: don't be a douchebag. Then it's just variations - don't be a d-bag to your client, don't be a d-bag to former clients, don't be a d-bag to opposing counsel, and so on. But I have a feeling that writing all that on the test will not earn me high marks.
Holy smokes, it's almost the holidays and I haven't done really any holiday shopping! I should probably just give everyone a Santa hat and act really offended if they don't like it or act confused. Rejecting a Santa hat in late December is like hating America. Right Rick Perry?
I have plans to have the nerdiest law school party ever. It will be called the "Ex Parte" (that's a law joke...yeah). And it will only go downhill from there. We can serve an apple tort(e). There will be Federal Rules of Party Procedure. And so on. I'll think of more awful law jokes later.
FYI: this is why law school's law revue shows are not funny. Law jokes are uniformly terribly.
My annual birthday gathering at the Big Hunt was this Saturday. A decent amount of people came out given that it was mid-finals. Despite having a server who hated me for ordering a drink from the bar (when she took ten minutes to come by the table), it went pretty well. I saw some peeps I have not seen in a while, and there was general merriment. And Sunday I was able to combat the hangover enough to get some actual work done. For the win!
Tomorrow afternoon there is a planned brunch at the bar closest to school. Then a much-deserved nap. The nap isn't group planned.
The Model Rules of Professional Responsibility can be summed up in one sentence: don't be a douchebag. Then it's just variations - don't be a d-bag to your client, don't be a d-bag to former clients, don't be a d-bag to opposing counsel, and so on. But I have a feeling that writing all that on the test will not earn me high marks.
Holy smokes, it's almost the holidays and I haven't done really any holiday shopping! I should probably just give everyone a Santa hat and act really offended if they don't like it or act confused. Rejecting a Santa hat in late December is like hating America. Right Rick Perry?
I have plans to have the nerdiest law school party ever. It will be called the "Ex Parte" (that's a law joke...yeah). And it will only go downhill from there. We can serve an apple tort(e). There will be Federal Rules of Party Procedure. And so on. I'll think of more awful law jokes later.
FYI: this is why law school's law revue shows are not funny. Law jokes are uniformly terribly.
My annual birthday gathering at the Big Hunt was this Saturday. A decent amount of people came out given that it was mid-finals. Despite having a server who hated me for ordering a drink from the bar (when she took ten minutes to come by the table), it went pretty well. I saw some peeps I have not seen in a while, and there was general merriment. And Sunday I was able to combat the hangover enough to get some actual work done. For the win!
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