Anticlimax and the End of Classes

Law school classes and all school classes are now officially done. I'm happy, but it was anticlimactic. I was thinking about bringing in those things where you pull a string and it explodes with confetti to Trusts & Estates, but I didn't out of respect for the cleaning staff. Class just ended, then I left and ate lunch. No Alice Cooper blaring over the PA system. No congratulatory handshake from a man in a tuxedo and top hat who is also handing me a key to the city. Just a sandwich. Anticlimax. But still, I'm happy about it. After my last class, I went over a practice test for Separation of Powers with a classmate. I'm trying to hit the ground running for finals, but I feel pretty prepared and I have tons of time. So I guess I'm in a good place with that.

On some level I can't believe I made it through to the end of law school. I really contemplated calling it quits during first year in particular. But here I am. One paper and three finals to go.

What's that? Oh, my paper is finished. Just three finals to go. That's right, I made the necessary edits on my Antitrust paper. But I'm no fool; this time I'm going to sit on it and not hand it in until the end. Yes, last time I was being unnecessarily cranky about having to do extra work and it was a reflection I'm not proud of. But I'm also not proud that I ate so many Charleston Chews today. And they were delicious. My paper is gloriously done. And I feel pretty good about it. The professor is talking about workshopping it in the summer/fall into something that I will eventually publish to "make a name for myself in the field." That's a generous offer. We'll see how it goes. I'm pretty intimidated by the fact that he can make a few phone calls and have the principal lawyers for the that case I am writing about come talk to me. I'm worried they are just sucking up to my professor and will think my paper is...how do you say...terrible. I'd rather not have my bubble burst at the moment. I'm proud of my original research.

Overheard in DC: "Meet Anne. She is our gender conflict sociologist advanced researcher." What?! That is not an acceptable job title. It means nothing yet each individual part is a buzzword. Impressive in its own way, I admit, but not in the way it is supposed to be.

Diligent Guys Finish Last

Right, I have something to complain about that is caddy and quite frankly does not represent my best qualities. That's exactly why I created this blog. Thanks, blog. So here it is. My Antitrust professor announced a few weeks ago that he would like to see drafts of our papers to give us feedback before the final draft was handed in. I worked diligently and got a draft to him early - last week. Today in class my professor thanks the three of us who handed in drafts, schedules meetings with us for tomorrow to give us feedback, and tells everyone the due date for the papers. Sounds to me like the people who didn't hand in drafts just hand in the final. The people who did hand in drafts have to do more work revising them. So by working diligently, I get more work to do. And I can't exactly say this to him because the response is "So your paper will be better." Yes, it might be. But I also have to do much more work on it than anyone else. And honestly my priority right now is getting all of my law school work done. As quickly as possible. We'll see what the feedback is tomorrow and how much revising he expects me to do. But right now my reaction is: Damn. It.

Moving on to complaining about Trusts and Estates, a now-weekly segment. Yesterday, we spent an hour and a half learning about fiduciary duties. Or re-learning. Or re-re-learning, as it were. Since I've already learned about fiduciary duties in at least two classes that I can think of. So basically this was nothing but a gigantic waste of my time. I really must thank my previous professors for teaching my trusts and estates. Full of rage.

I spent the weekend in Boston for Passover. Seder at our house included nine delicious bottles of Veuve Clicquot. Seder at my cousin's house included nine crazy relatives. It was a mixed bag.

Finals pressure is beginning. Even though little is on the line, I'm beginning to stress out and feel pressure. I have rarely wanted something to be done as much as I do law school. I might have a "Suck it, law school" themed graduation party. You can come.

Goodbye, Rick Santorum. It's been real. My presidential race prediction: there will be a serious lack of sweater-vests on the campaign trail. Another prediction: Mitt Romney will say something disingenuous.

Facebook has been threatening to give me a "timeline" for a while now. And gmail has been telling me it will update its look soon. But I like my profile and my current "look." You can take them when you pry them from Charleton Heston's cold dead hands! Ew, that's actually a creepy reference. Though appropriate for Passover.

Gold Card

Today I purchased enough beverages on my Starbucks Card to qualify for a Gold Card. I am awesome. I don't find it problematic at all that I've purchased 30 drinks at Starbucks over the past two and a half months. I'm really saving money since all my extras like syrup and soy are free. And every 15 drinks I buy, I get a free one. Things are fine. "Denial ain't just a river in Egypt." You can't even be addicted to caffeine. It's just psychological. And required among law students.

I finally filed by state taxes. It's a lot more gratifying than it really should be. Now all the administrative work I have to do is filing my bar application. Great. Who wants to write me a recommendation? As far as I can tell the only qualification is that you cannot be a family member. And you can't lie about my criminal record. So you can't say I have one. I would also prefer it is you overlooked some of my indiscretions like anything mentioned on this blog. It's likely only a matter of time until you have to disclose all blogs and social networking sites you operate to the board of bar examiners.
How do you become a member of the board of bar examiners? Do you get paid for that? Seems like an easy job, if a bit sadistic.

My Antitrust professor will now get to review to possible train wreck that is my paper. On the flip side, it could be pretty good. I'm not sure, so I guess that I'm happy to get preliminary feedback on it. It has math in it and an appendix containing graphs and charts! This is some high school stuff, in the way that it is stuff I haven't done since high school. Now I am preparing to be disappointed when I get a comment saying "This is high school-level legal reasoning." Hrm. Upon consideration, that is the comment I would give to my Trust & Estates professor about his class. Can't wait until course evaluation time!

I don't get Google+. Can someone explain why I need one?

You know how homosexuals aren't a protected class? Well I clearly think it is ridiculous. I think that we should give protections to any class that Hitler persecuted. If Hitler hated them, they are doing something right. That's how we should determine things.

The more law school I get through, the angrier I get when I listen to non-lawyers talk about legal issues as if they are totally assured of what they are saying. Most recently prompted by a discussion about Supreme Court justices recusing themselves about the health care case.

Taking Tax was really helpful. I can tell people that lottery winnings are definitely not taxed at a different rate than income from your job. That's just false. It's all income (and then there's capital gains, but let's not get into it). Look at the tax brackets; nothing is taxed even close to 50%

Sweater Is Better. No Stealing.

Drunk fantasy baseball drafts are probably not the way to win the season.

Happy first day of spring. I began the day quite early, being woken up by a huge clap of thunder. I began the day for the second time also quite early, since construction on the building diagonally across from mine begins at 7:15 am. Yeah, that construction really might result in me moving. I began my day for the third time at a reasonable hour, but an unreasonable humidity. It's only March 20th, and I already find it oppressively humid in DC. A bad harbinger. Also, I'm just a New England boy. If you can go outside without a jacket before April, I disapprove. Honestly, it is t-shirt weather already. I wish it stayed colder because, well, I love wearing sweaters. They are probably my favorite clothing item. The more days I can wear a sweater, the better. I think I have a slogan here: Sweater is Better. (c) 2012.

It's nice out so I think I'm just going to listen to Sublime. Does anyone else just feel that compulsion?

Apparently a picture is circulating comparing my Antitrust professor to Dwight Schrute. The comparison is apt to an unfortunate degree. Tonight's class was supposed to be about the recent AT&T - T-Mobile attempted merger. Instead, we got a 90 minute lecture on this history of the telecommunications industry in the United States. Then fifteen minutes of merger discussion, followed by fifteen minutes of observations we have heard three times before. It would be infuriating, but I'm so used to it.
So for a change I am looking at it on the bright side. Rather than being mad about a prolonged tangent, I learned a lot about the history of the telecom industry. And rather than completely tune out, I did some listening. With my ears. Really what I am trying to say is: at least I wasn't sitting through Trusts & Estates.

One paper and three exams. Just keep telling myself that. For graduation, I think we get poofy sleees.

Valentines Day in Class

Happy Valentines Day. I spent this evening not out to dinner, but rather in my Antitrust Seminar. Whoop-dee-freaking-do. The class is supposed to be about mergers, so how did we end up with my professor ranting about the Federal Reserve Board's groupthink decision-making pre-2007? I really couldn't tell you. I think I took three lines of notes in the entire two hour class. And all three lines were just because I felt like I should write something.
And if he explains to me what a heuristic is one more time, I might throw my laptop.

That's really all I've got.

I'm actually in a fairly good mood. I just don't know how to show it. Sadie's coming on Thursday night. My Trusts and Estates cold call went well. Fantasy baseball is starting. How bad could it be?

Secret Holds

Well today's Antitrust class was interesting. My professor arrived six minutes late, put his bag down, then left to get a soda. Two minutes later his Diet Coke exploded upon opening it. The next hour and fifty-two minutes of the class was purportedly about the independence of antitrust enforcement agencies. But if I had to title the lecture it would be "I hate the Senate's confirmation process." While he did talk a bit about "the law" and cases like Humphrey's Executor, far more time was spent disparaging the current Senate, the process of putting holds on nominees, and the disclosure procedures that nominees must go through. He's a former FTC Commissioner, and apparently he has a number of grievances. But he does know what he's talking about. It was an amusing, if less than enlightening, class period.

We are now in the shadow period of sports. A time where nothing I care about is going on. Damn it, February. Also, why do I have to pay full rent this month? I guess the leap year helps, but I am still full of resentment.

Is it racist that Black History Month is the shortest month of the year?

Facebook memes have to be reigned in. It's all getting too much. My news feed is exploding with not-so-funny captioned pictures.

Second to Last Second to Last Day of Classes

I'd like to call it the last day of classes, but I guess I do have Public Interest Lawyering tomorrow night. That's barely a class. So today was the last day of "real" classes. And we just give applause to any professor on the last day of class these days. Even my Evidence professor, who was useless all semester. Today's class period was dominated by reviewing a practice test, only we didn't get through the test because my classmates were busy asking redundant questions or coming up with crazy hypothetical facts that were never implicated in the question. I thought the practice test was fairly straightforward. I'm not saying I would have aced it, but I would have done pretty well for the minimal amount of studying I have put in to date. Don't worry, I'll study more before the actual test. But I am relieved to see my classmates blundering so badly. Remember, grades are on a curve. Oh the joys of pointless law school competition.

This evening my Evidence professor emailed the class saying that he would be out of the country for the next two weeks and good luck on the test. The "suckers" was implied.

I had the pleasure of finishing my second Antitrust outline today. One is historical, one is by issue. I think I'll need both. And I have about 75 cases to remember. No big deal. This is what I get from the one class I liked this semester. It's a busy study period.

I don't really get what was going on with Crosby, Stills and Nash. And Young? What's the deal?

I went with Giri and Dan to get lunch at a group of food trucks today. The first one we approached had a lot of options - like ten different things. I was about to order some sort of chicken wrap when the guy in the truck informed me that all they had left was Chicken Bahn Mi and Lamb on Rice. Giri ordered the lamb, and that was the last lamb on rice they had. Dude, why is your truck still here? Go home and restock. You can't give me ten options to ogle and then only have one. Especially while there are at least two other trucks right there. Competition fail. I clearly went to another truck. Even if I wanted chicken bahn mi, my sense of propriety was so offended. You should have at least a third of your menu.

Welcome To Finals

Thanksgiving came and went. It was nice to get away from school and DC for a bit, but the brief vacation left me wanting more. For the third straight year, my mom and I went to a weird family thing in upstate New York. It's at a "mountain house," which is fun if you like group hiking trips and fresh mountain air. But I don't. I mean, the air is fine. But I'd prefer other activities. Like sleeping and shooting apples off of people's heads. Someone did that once to his son. Don't act like you don't know what I'm talking about.
My room was on the hallway outside the dining room, so every morning I got to hear stupid little kids screaming before and after breakfast. And their parents: "Billy knows all of the presidents. Billy, whose picture is that? No, that's Herbert Hoover. He was president." Apparently Billy does not know all the presidents. Now get to breakfast and stop hanging out in the hall outside my room. It's before 9 AM, have some respect.
Actual Thanksgiving was served at noon. A tradition I am not the biggest fan of. But the food was good. And Alan Alda was there. Not a joke. He actually goes there for Thanksgiving each year (and I bet he loves it when people yell "Hey Hawkeye!!!"). I also got to play Settlers of Catan with some cousins, so that was good.

Then I got about a day and a half at home. Not enough time. I didn't get to see nearly enough people. I was split between working and relaxing and got to do neither properly. So here I am back in DC. And now it's time to suit up. Or...outline up. Due to a lapse of judgment, or an attitude of ambivalence, I didn't realize when my finals were. Turns out they are scheduled for next Tuesday and Wednesday. That's pretty close, so it's business time.

The bad news is: I don't know Evidence and I have a long way to go in Antitrust. The good news is: most 3Ls are even lazier than me and even more behind in finals preparations. The best news is: these are my last fall semester finals and the last time that finals will interfere with my birthday. In a theme that will probably be repeated on this blog: I cannot wait to be done with law school.

The drive down to DC from Boston took a good long time. Thanks for driving, Nakul! Aside from spending half the drive in Jersey, the most exciting thing that happened was being right behind a police bust. As we were driving through Connecticut, four police cars stopped traffic, pulled over a truck, and approached it with weapons drawn. Hey now, that's something you don't see every day. We were front row for a potential firefight. Think I'm exaggerating? Check out this huge gun one dude had.



Yeah, that's what I thought. What was going on?? My guess was a drug bust, but you really never know. Luckily, the men in the truck went peacefully. Front row is good for cirque du soleil, but not a gun battle.
Photo courtesy of my iPhone. Yeah, it's nice to have a phone that takes pictures, not to mention one that I can actually hear.

How Was Your First Day?

My biggest reflection on the first day of classes has to do with my Evidence professor. He is an older, portly man who just likes to sit down in random places in the room while he is talking. Plop is really a better word to describe what he does. He just sat down on the table, kicked his legs up, and kept talking about "the elephant in the room" with regards to evidence law for some reason. My favorite part of the class is that while moving around his seating, he ended up teaching about half of the class while sitting in the window sill like a cat. Except he is notably un-cat-like.

My Antitrust professor is just old and kind. Is he a Mormon? I don't know. Maybe. Supply and demand curves almost gave me anxiety, but I mastered the fear. Yes, Intro to Economics was my far and away worst grade in college. I'm not proud of it. But I am facing my fear. Plus I have a few good friends in the class, which helps motivate me to stay. Also, it can be a really useful subject. But there's a lot of reading. And I don't wanna do it. Quiet, stop whining. Suck it up, get back into the rhythm. Deal with it. Alright, fine.

I pissed off a bus driver so badly today by repeating my question twice when his first response was a noncommittal grunt. Sorry, grunting bus driver, sorry to ruin your nonverbal day. Drive the bus now. More speed, less attitude.